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Sometimes in life you just have to say what you think.

Even if it makes you a bit unpopular.

I think Modern Family (formerly the best sitcom on TV) now sucks and The Artist (formerly Best Picture or maybe according to the Academy still is) was long and boring and I wish I had at least gotten popcorn to make the evening enjoyable.

What the hell happened to Modern Family? The plot lines are now incredibly predictable, Gloria is always shouting and last week’s episode about women always acting like mad crazy biatches when they have their period was just so cliched and insulting.

I’m not going to use that other annoying cliche… jumped the shark. But I’m just saying that if Manny was water skiing, he would totally jump over some kind of big finned fish.

I’d rather watch New Girl for the hilarious roommates or Happy Endings for the quick banter or Parks & Recreation for the quirky characters.

As for The Artist… As someone who once played the role of Watson in a production of Sherlock Holmes at acting camp and only had about three lines but got to be on stage the entire time (how awesome is that?), I certainly appreciate limited dialogue. The Artist is a cool concept and I like the way the movie is a nod to Singing in the Rain.

BUT oh my god did I almost fall asleep. Rick and I haven’t seen a movie together in a theater since the Hangover came out. That was 2009.

So after three years, maybe my expectations were a little high for movie date night. Plus, that Oscar hype.

Here’s how it went down. I will make this MUCH shorter than the movie. First I liked it. Then I got tired. Then it got really long in the middle. Which made me more fatigued. Then there was some tap dancing. Which perked me up. And then it was over. Which made me happy.

We ran into another couple at the theater. They had just come out of Project X. No, not the 1987 Matthew Broderick chimpanzee film. Although I’m sure they are going to re-release that in theaters nationwide very soon. I’ll keep you posted. I’m referring to the new Project X which is apparently about a totally EPIC teen party.

So would you rather sit through a film with no dialogue or blasting music? It’s a sad choice for a Friday night at the movies.

mama bird notes:

My friend Lanie was sweet enough to nominate me for Circle of Moms Top 25 Funniest Moms and I’d love for you to vote for me. Just click here. There is no signing in or anything! It will only take two seconds. You can actually vote for me every 24 hours. But I would never expect you to do it more than every 48 hours.  Thank you!!

18 Responses to the artist and modern family: you have failed me

  • Brandice says:

    I’m glad you spoke up. I really didn’t like the way they handled Hailey’s disclosure about her relationship with Dillon. I was so unimpressed I didn’t even watch the “period” episode. I’m used to being the unpopular opinion lady, but I am happy to see someone of your admirable status sharing a similar view. At least I can tell my husband, “See… Kelcey agrees with me!”. Maybe I will save that for Tuesday night though, after he has forced me to see The Artist with him. 🙂

  • Honest Mum says:

    Have to disagree with you on the Artist-thought it was the most uplifting, beautifully made film I’ve seen in a long time. A love letter to the movies!

  • Loukia says:

    I really hope Modern Family doesn’t start to suck. I still have faith, but… it is not like, as amazing as it used to be, you know? Also, how could even go to the movies without getting popcorn? I’d NEVER not get popcorn! Last night I went to the theatre and got popcorn, and brought it home to watch Desperate Housewives and GCB!

  • Lanie says:

    Please vote! You are number #8 right now! I still think you are #1 and there are 17 days to vote so I will continue the vote for Kelcey campaign.

    I was just thinking the same thing about Modern Family – I am hoping it turns around and does not actually jump the shark (or do you think it is too late?).

    Have not seen the Artist – I think I will just be happy with your cliff notes version of it :-). xoxo

  • I am sad to hear that The Artist disappointed! I have been dying to see it for MONTHS (we live an hour away from a movie theater plus — no sitter — so am waiting for the DVD) because I saw the promos on TV here and was absolutely entranced by Berenice Bejo’s beauty.

    Also, with four kids under age 6, TWO SILENT HOURS sounds like heaven, at any price.

    Maybe I’ll rent another much-anticipated movie — The Descendants — instead, and get my Clooney on.

  • Carinn Jade says:

    We’re about 6 weeks behind on Modern Family but after reading this I guess I’ll just toss the DVR out the window now.

    Except I live on the 20th floor so maybe that’s not safe. Hit it with a hammer? Except I need it tonight for the Women Tell All.

    Maybe I’ll just open the Modern Family folder and give it the stink eye. Rrrrrrrr.

  • erinb says:

    I never got into Modern Family. I watched a couple episodes and found it really cliche and slapstick-ish (is that a word) I am pretty sure I am the only person on the universe not in love with this show. Thank you for joining me. BTW LOVE “new girl”!! my latest obsession plus it comes right after the fabulous GLEE so its a win win (Abby dont you agree?)

  • Kara says:

    I gave up tv for Lent, so not only do I have no opinion on the period episode, the post made me so sad.

    I wasn’t aware how much I missed my long lost friends until you reminded me. Oh, New Girl…Parks and Rec…Cougar Town, how I miss you all.

  • Nancy in Montana says:

    I, too am glad you spoke up. I didn’t see The Artist because I saw the trailer about 50 times (felt like that anyway) and it just looked like a novelty film that was going to win a bunch of Oscars and take away that possibility from more deserving nominees in all of the categories. You and Rick should have gone to see The Descendents instead; a much more deserving A) Best Picture, B) Best Actor and probably a bunch more awards. I’ve not watched Modern Family ever, even though I do like the lead actors in it a lot. My reason is probably just more of me being the picky Virgo that I am: I do NOT like the hand-held camera method! All of that herky jerky movement that tries to make it look like a reality show just makes me feel like I’m on a bad amusement park ride. Give me a good old-fashioned set with steady cam shots with different takes and good lighting. Make me feel like I could be at the movies, except for all of the commercials. Smash – now that’s a good new show with all of the elements that matter, in my humble opinion.

  • frankasen says:

    I slept through The Descendants, The Artist was 35 minutes too long. Iron Lady was 3 hours with my mother-law (RIP). Albert Nobbs was just creepy. There you have it!

  • Becky Rice says:

    I have never seen Modern Family, so I don’t know if it has begun sucking or not. The Artist is probably way too high-brow for me, since I believe the last two movies my husband and I saw together in a theater were Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows and The Hangover (NOT the sequel).

  • Carolyn says:

    If you think The Artist was bad…there was a little Brad Pitt movie called The Tree of Life. OMG, it was horrible. I really wanted to be uppity and like it, but it was so bizarre and I had to fast forward through most of it. Reading the reviews was more enjoyable.

  • Kate says:

    I can def see what you’re saying about Modern Family, but I still love the show! It will be very sad if they go the way too flat character route many great shows end with. I haven’t seen the Artist but I really hated Lost In Translation and I am curious if the Artist was something similar…my bet is yes!

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kelcey kintner