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I call Rick today at work with a very pressing matter and he is all like, “I’ve got two shows to anchor and I’m still preparing – what’s going on?”

He sounds super busy and distracted so I promise him this will only take 2 minutes of his time. Or 45 minutes. You can’t put time limits on important life discussions.

“We have a shower liner issue,” I explain, expecting that he will really listen up now that he understands the gravity of the situation.

“Ok,” he says.

“We need a new liner for the shower.  But because it’s that weird Victorian bathtub, the liner I bought is too long. So I went back to Bed, Bath & Beyond to exchange it but all the liners are the same length. You can’t buy a shorter one. So we can either use the long one and see if it’s annoying or we can shorten it. But do we really want to spend the money to shorten it, when the shelf life of a shower liner isn’t very long? What do you think?”

“Umm…,” he says.

I’m not getting much response so he is either mulling this over or reading up on the challenges facing General Petraeus in Afghanistan and the new economic numbers. It’s hard to gauge. I now realize the importance of the video phone.

“Couldn’t we shorten the liner ourselves? Don’t we have a sewing machine?” he asks. Oh my gosh – I can’t believe I’ve been able to keep him on the phone this long and he’s actually brainstorming about this!

“Well, yes, we have a sewing machine.”  It’s a relic from the first season of “Project Runway” when I absolutely, positively was going to start designing and sewing my own clothes but then lost my sewing mojo when I realized I could just buy clothes.

“But I don’t remember how to use the sewing machine anymore,” I explain.

Thankfully, he does not point out that it’s a huge waste of money to buy a sewing machine and then have no ability to use it and instead says, “Well, maybe we could just pin it up for something. Honey, I don’t know. I really have to go.”

And he clearly means: “I really could care less what you do with the liner but I’m trying to sound supportive because I know you’re up all night with the twins, completely sleep deprived and I don’t want to send you over the edge by being callous about the liner issue.

“Ok, no problem.” I let the poor guy get off the phone so he can actually work.

And since I’ve already dedicated way too much time to a shower liner (the buying, the almost returning and then the discussing), I just put it up. I’m done.  If anyone wants to shorten it, I’ll give you my address.

26 Responses to i’ll just call my husband at work

  • Alecia says:

    What a guy! I remember calling my husband with similar dilemmas when I was on maternity leave and I could hear the ridiculousness in my question yet I couldn’t help from asking it.

    If you lived closer, I would recruit my mom to hem it. I guess it is probably not called hemming with a curtain, shows you how much I know about sewing. She would gladly do it.

  • Sue says:

    Ha, I think one of the moments I made my husband happiest was when I told him a story, after he got home from work, that ended with, “so, I figured you’d rather I didn’t call, and just decided myself, so we’ve got this one!” That’s when I realised my brain was recovering.
    Hang in there!

  • rachel says:

    Can’t u just double fold the liner into. The rings? Do u know what I mean- it would make it shorter when u put it up.

  • Shana says:

    On my short shower, I just cut that puppy off and leave it unhemmed. It’s a liner. It’s on the inside. No one sees it except the person showering. When it get tatty, I just replace it. But I? Am lazy. And ghetto.

  • Catherine says:

    We used to have the same problem when we lived in an apartment with a clawfoot tub. Perhaps it wasn’t classy, but we just cut off a couple inches at the bottom–no sewing, no pinning. Hope that helps!

  • Lauren says:

    I just called my husband at work to tell him this story :). I also have four little ones, the youngest of whom are 8 month old twins and a friend suggested I start following your blog. So glad she did–it’s great!!

  • OHmommy says:

    OMG. I too have a sewing machine collecting dust after the first season of project runway. I totally thought I would sew clothes for the girls. Ha. So glad my husband doesn’t mention how much our investment cost us.

  • Wendi says:

    I think in this economy, you should strongly consider starting your own alterations business. I mean, you have all this spare time on your hands.

  • Peta says:

    Dont feel bad. I have 4 sewing machines sort of collecting dust. Yeah, you read that right – 4.
    But no need for a sewing machine! Stich Wichery to the rescue. Iron on glue for hems!I half feel your pain, cuz I only have 2 kids…..

  • francine Kasen says:

    I have a sewing machine that I know how to use…BUT I would just use my scissors on this one! If you want, I’ll give it a whirl if you wanta bring or mail it to me! XXX F
    Welcome Lauren!!!

  • Becky says:

    If you are talking about the fabric curtain that goes on the outside of the shower you can buy stuff in the fabric store that you can hem with your iron. It is a no sew fabric bond. I used it on my curtains in my living room and it looks like they are hemed. However if you mean the plastic liner that sits in the shower I don’t know if it will work on that but you might want to try. Good Luck! I have a fine art degree and can’t sew an inch! LOL

  • layla solms says:

    my sewing machine is a pice of CRAP, so for all of you who have one sitting and collecting dust, send it my way. you think i’m kidding, but i’m not!

    cut the liner–by the way, is it fabric or plastic?

  • Bob Demchick says:

    1. Congratulations! The kids are beautiful.
    2. Sybie looks great.
    3. Say ‘Hi” to Rick for me.
    4. Raise the curtain rod.

  • E says:

    When I was home with my first newborn I called my husband during a photo shoot and said, “OMG! Vanessa Williams is hawking ProActive–can you believe it?” Because I had PPD he did not yell at me. You have two so you have double excuse to be loony tunes.

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kelcey kintner