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Before you have kids, you lose things. You lose your phone, your sunglasses, your driver’s license, your favorite going out shirt, your key chain with the beer bottle opener, that sort of thing.

But once you have kids, you lose everything.


Photo courtesy of The Deluded Diva

You still lose the stuff you used to lose. Like your keys because you have no idea why you don’t put them on the key hook which is so conveniently located right by the door but instead shove them in your pockets, under mail, in the fridge, in the laundry bin, you know wherever.

But now you are also losing things that other people are moving.

Like today, I really wanted to take a bike ride with 2 year old Cash. He’s been sick all week so I haven’t been able to go to the gym because for some reason they frown upon dropping children off at the gym’s childcare center who have hacking coughs and unstoppable running noses.

So I put Cash in the bike seat, hopped on and peddled off. Except it was ridiculously hard to peddle. Like I felt like I was biking up Mount Kilimanjaro. And that’s when I realized my tires needed air. I returned home but couldn’t find the bike pump anywhere. I looked in the normal spots where it should be. Nothing.

I immediately thought my oldest daughter could be responsible. She has a creative force like no other – like she rearranged her entire room (including moving heavy furniture) one afternoon without even mentioning it to me. And yes, she created a blueprint first.

So I imagined that she must have had some need for this bike pump – like using it to blow up balloons so she can airlift herself out of her 5th grade class when she gets bored. Because that’s the kind of thing she would try to make happen.

This is the girl who once said to me, “Get me a shovel and some cement and I can put a pool in the backyard this afternoon.” And I sort of believed her.

Turns out, I was wrong this time.  I found out later that our neighbor borrowed the pump. Although in retrospect, I feel like I got a sufficient workout in the one block I biked with flat tires. Sometimes it’s quality over quantity.

And by the time I had gotten all Nancy Drew and figured out the location of the bike pump, I was already looking for something else anyway.  I was searching for a Curious George book my son needed for a book report for perseverance week.

Because if anybody has persevered in life, it’s that Curious George.

I finally found the book.  Just in time to start looking for the Halloween costumes we purchased a few weeks ago.

I’ve started to notice that about 87% of parenthood is moving things back to to where they are supposed to be. You know – if you can find them.

5 Responses to if you often lose things, parenthood won’t help

  • Daphne says:

    I can’t believe when I hear my mother’s voice in my mouth telling my kids to look again in their rooms because WHEN I COME UP THERE I KNOW I WILL FIND THEM RIGHT WHERE YOU LEFT THEM!

  • Lanie says:

    Hope that Cash is feeling better and that the Curious George book report went well! I seem to spend the majority of my waking time looking for things (lately Lego pieces). I always think if I were more organized I would spend less time looking for things – but you are one of the most organized people I know – so maybe there is hope that I will get some of my searching hours back. If we ever do what will we do with all that extra time? xo

  • Mary Clare says:

    Ha! If it’s not the kids, it’s my absent-minded husband. While he’s super smart, somehow the idea that the milk could be behind the orange juice carton eludes him every time. =)

  • hokgardner says:

    In our house if we can’t find something, we look in my 12 year old’s room. She’s like a magpie. If it’s bright and shiny, she swipes and takes it to her room. I spent two days tearing the house apart looking for my new purse before giving up. A month later, she showed up and said “Look what I “found” under my bed.”

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kelcey kintner