I just want you to know that if my husband and I go all Heidi Klum and Seal someday, it will totally be because of grapes.
By the way, my daughter Dylan was once in a baby class with Heidi’s daughter Leni in the West Village and I’ll have you know that Heidi is super tall and pretty and seemed quite nice in that “I’m a model but I don’t hate you because you’re not” way and due to our deep connection from that one 40 minute class, I’m obviously devastated over their break-up.
Back to grapes.
I tend to obsess over choking hazards (hot dogs and quarters are also high on my list) and of course, the potential for a shoe lace to get caught in an escalator or the possible dangers of putting plastic in the dishwasher but let’s stay focused.
For the past seven years, I’ve been pleading with Rick (that’s my husband or Seal in this scenario) to cut the grapes the LONG way so that when our kids are babies and toddlers, it doesn’t get lodged in their throats.
He does cut them but not necessarily to my liking. Sometimes he cuts them horizontally which doesn’t meet my specifications or he only cuts them in half which I still deem too large. There is a lot of critiquing and modifying and disagreement over this.
And he defends himself by saying, “No one ever even cut my grapes!”
Look, my parents threw me in a baby backpack and took me out on their motorcycle but I’m not recommending we do that.
I do allow my 7-year-old to eat whole grapes. Organic if possible.
And I would allow my 5-year-old to eat whole grapes if I could ever convince her to actually put one in her mouth.
And I don’t peel grapes which I know some moms favor.
But I do like to cut them pretty small for Chase and Harlowe, mostly because they are 20 months old and I’ve seen Harlowe shove half of a pizza in her mouth in one sitting. And she’s also a food hoarder.
We were putting her to bed the other night, and she had something shoved in her cheek from breakfast. I haven’t been that committed to breakfast since the S’Mores Pop Tart was invented. I just don’t want an entire grape hanging out in that cheek of hers for 3 days.
I’m guessing that like many things – Rick will never stress over this. And I always will.
When our twins get older, we will stop cutting their grapes. It won’t be a conscious decision. Just one day, we will realize that we don’t do it anymore. And like so many childhood milestones, it will just suddenly be done.
And then, when all our kids are grown and have gone on to fancy careers in biotechnology or working at Coyote Ugly (whichever) and Rick and I are living in our warm weather gated community, I will turn to him and say, “Remember, when we used to cut our kids’ grapes? Which one of us was totally obsessed with that?”
And I bet we won’t even remember.
mama bird notes:
Sponsored Video: Horizon Organic
My focus is definitely on food today because of my wonderful sponsor… Horizon Organic. I love when I get an opportunity to work with a company that I have adored for years. My kids eats tons of Horizon Organic products like milk, cheese and yogurt. The company is running a super cute campaign right now where kids define things like “organic” and “pesticides.” I’m starting to think some kids are really smart. Take a look…