Spice Up Your Inbox. Subscribe Today.

enter your email address:




blog advertising is good for you






Jan
25
2012

I recently met a woman whose daughter will turn two in July.

And she’s pregnant.

With twins.

They’re coming in May.

And I had to cover my mouth with imaginary duct tape to prevent myself from belting out, “You’ll have your hands full!”

She had a few questions for me like…

“I’ve been reading some books about multiples and they all insist I can easily nurse the twins in public! Is that true?”

“Hell to the no girlfriend. Maybe in the car. With a giant size nursing pillow. But do not attempt to sit your postpardum self on a park bench and nurse those twins simultaneously. Because you will either drop one or create a crowd of onlookers that would make Lady Ga Ga jealous.”

And then she asked…

“What kind of car do we need?”

“A mini cooper. Definitely the best option! Wait, did I say Mini Cooper? I meant minivan.”

“Everyone tells me it’s going to be horrible having newborn twins and a young toddler. Is it really that bad?”

In my head: “Oh yes, the first year is going to be rough. REALLY rough. The summer after my twins were born, I was so tired, I inadvertently locked my husband in the basement and he was so tired, he was introducing our son as Chad. I would have corrected him but who had the energy?

And I’m pretty sure my older girls were raising themselves. Which would explain the day they almost burned down the kitchen. But now my twins are 20 months-old and except for a little incident today where Chase unrolled an entire roll of toilet paper, sprinkled a bag of grapes throughout the house like confetti and then broke a glass snow globe in the bathtub, it’s smooth sailing!

Outloud: “It’s not bad at all! Sure, there will be a smidgeon of fatigue. And just a hair of guilt. And maybe just a bit of chaos. But no worries! Children are a wonderful blessing. Having one is just like three. You’ll be fabulous! Best of luck to you!!”

Sometimes it’s just better not to know what’s coming.


30 Responses to you’re expecting twins?! here’s what you need to know.

  • YES IT’S HORRIBLE!!! oh boy, is it hard. But it’s fabulous and special and it’s your own preschool in your living room. The first year of my twins’ life was miserable for me. I was thrilled of course, but so insanely tired and truly unhappy–above and beyond normal postpartum blues to be fair.
    I still think I am the luckiest person ever. I still want another baby! (some days that’s true anyway.)

  • Meghan says:

    My daughter was slated to turn two about 8 weeks after my twins were born, but the twins came early, so she ended up being 20 mos. when we brought them home. And yes, it was soul suckingly hard! Of course, the PTSD involved will allow you to forget the vast majority of the first year, except during late night panic attacks….

    But now? Twins are 5, big sis is almost 7, and wow IT IS AWESOME! All three play together, are best friends, and it is extremely rare that they are not happily self entertaining while I screw around on the computer. In my book, well worth the pain and the completely trashed abdomen!

    • Kelcey says:

      I really agree. Even now (with my twins 20 months), all my kids will play together at moments and it is the SWEETEST thing in the whole world. Although I would not want to relive that first summer.

  • Elle's Mom + 2! says:

    I’ve got identical twin girls on the way, and they have a big sis who will be nearly five when they arrive (the only advantage of struggling for two years to get pregnant!). It will be easier with a big kid, right? Right? RIGHT?!

    • Steph says:

      Congrats! Although I’m a godmother to twins, I don’t have my own. But I did have my younger daughter when my older daughter was 5 and it was awesome. Big sis loved the baby and was so helpful, bringing me wet wipes, etc.

      • Kerri says:

        Definitely easier with older kids! I have 7. Twins were #5 & 6. I also have fostered 2 sets of twins (babies for a year and toddlers for 3.5 years).

        Check out Karen Kerkhoff Gromada on the internet. She is a twin mom, LLL Leader & IBCLC & runs mutiple support groups as well as a web-site & e-group. She has spoken all through North America & I am pretty sure in other countries too!

  • MN Mama says:

    I have a friend who has two sets of twins (now ages 6 and 16 months). She is convinces multiples are easier after the age of two because they are the best of friends.

  • Maggie says:

    Bright Side: breaking the snow globe in the bath tub probably contained the liquid & glass shards to a smaller area than the living room floor would have ?!?!!?

    It’s all about the tiny victories right?

  • Becca says:

    Nothing wrong with telling a little white lie as long as no one is hurt..or at least that’s my opinion. No need to induce early labor with horror stories of what’s to come πŸ˜‰

    When I get asked what it’s like to have had twins I like to say that I am a survivor and still relatively sane. I don’t know if I’d say it’s easier now that they are older, I think we all just handle it better. Some days.

  • red pen mama says:

    I have always admired parents of twins. Because having just one newborn at a time comes with amazing challenges, and I just can’t imagine having two newborns at one time. Kudos to you, and you were kind to that soon-to-be-new-mom-of-twins. It’s best not to terrorize the pregnant women.

  • Lee says:

    Kelcey

    I’m $175 lighter in the pocketbook after plumber left today. Apparently Stuart (25 month old twin) thinks its a hoot to flush all of the below: lightning McQueen, mater, pacifiers, and Barbie cell phones.

    My older 2 also raised themselves and I’m sure I’ll pay for it when they have to go lay on the couch with psychologist to discuss the neglect. That will be exactly the same time I will be laying on another couch with another doctor, still having heart palpitations.

    One foot in front othe other. If you walk far enough, you might hit a happy hour and scream “JAILBREAK”

  • Kerri says:

    I was able to nurse my twins, at the same time while just about anywhere. I spent 4 days straight (other then to go home to sleep) at a local fair when the babies were only a few weeks old. I had them each in a sling (No shoulder padding as to make it easier to cross them over in the back.) There are photos here & I am the bottom left. I used the football hold for both in that photo. I could also have one in the cradle in the sling & one in the football hold. People thought the slings were fancy scarves!

    http://www.karengromada.com/sling-two/

  • Aimee says:

    I keep telling my friend she needs to read your blog or contact you! She has 3 kids 5 and under (the youngest 1 1/2 yr old) and pregnant with twins coming in April! 5 kids 5 and under!!!!!! I seriously don’t know how she will do it!

  • Julie B says:

    I could be wrong but I believe having the older sibling younger than 2.5-4 when the babes come home will be hard but not as hard if they were in the above range. My oldest son was 2.5 when I had the triplets and we are still having really hard days. It became more hard for me once the babes started moving around and older brother didn’t/doesn’t understand their fragility they still have even now at 16 months. It is also HIS age which he had more of the terrible 3’s than the 2’s.

    I would think an older sibling that is 5+ would be so awesome to have when bringing home twins +. They would be in school so you would have more time with the babes during the day and they are more willing to help and able to help more at that age. Not just the babies but to help themselves which is less work on the parents. Correct me if I’m wrong.

  • Nina says:

    I have twin brothers and twin nieces…oh we’ve got stories. Like the time the boys were about two, crawled into the car, put it in neutral and rolled down the hill into our neighbor’s fence. Or the time when one of the twins locked himself in the deep freeze in the garage only no one knew where he was and we all about had a heart attack when we finally found him…unfrozen and alive, thank God. Good luck with the twins. I said a little prayer every time I had a sonogram that they would only see one little baby in there. πŸ™‚

  • Natalie says:

    Once I was in an elevator with my 2 month old twin boys and a man leaned over to look in the stroller and said “My wife and I are pregnant with twins”. My response “Oh, I’m sorry! Uh, I mean, that’s great”. That’s when I realized what you said- it’s better not to know whats coming. My daughter was 17 MONTHS when the boys were born. AWESOME. They are 10 month now and I’m still here. That in itself is a victory.

  • Courtney says:

    I don’t think anything anyone can tell you can really prepare you for what’s coming when you have twins (or when you have kids in general)… so it’s probably best to do what you did and let her live in blissful fairy tale land before reality sets in. That said, having twins did smooth the road when we had our 3rd – the twins are almost 3 and the baby is 4 months and we still comment to each other that this “one baby at a time gig” is cake.

  • Riss says:

    Oh. my. goodness. Breastfeed twins in public…like you said it so well, lady gaga would be proud. I don’t think I could tandem nurse without taking off my whole shirt!! (maybe she could do them one at a time…but seriously, even that requires like an hour and four sets of hands and a minimum of 12 pillows. hahaha. If she does it, she is my hero.

    My twin daughters are 9 months old and boy am I tired! This post made me laugh and also feel sort of a secret special feeling to be a mom of twins. I’m not lying when I say the physical work part of changing diapers and feeding and laundry is exhausting. But, (and this is hard for me to believe) the girls will already sit and play together for hours! It’s incredible.

  • People always act like I’m some kind of super hero for having three babies in 18 months (2 pregnancies – singleton and then surprise twins). But I know someone who had FOUR babies in 15 months (2 pregnancies – triplets and then surpise #4). So it’s all relative. The moral of this story: it all pretty much sucks…and it’s all fantastic – the best thing ever – how did I ever live before them? Choose your own perspective-adventure series style.


kelcey kintner


Search


Archives