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If you have a baby, that baby will likely fall off the bed.

I mean, it doesn’t happen to every parent. But it does happen frequently. This is based on statistical data collected from the files of I’ve-Just-Sort-Of-Heard-It-Happens-To-A-Lot-Of-Parents. It’s just that babies go from being pretty stationary to some sort of acrobatic navy seal in just a matter of minutes.

Luckily, babies are very durable and it’s usually the first time parents who suffer the most. First time parents already had their suspicions that no one should be letting them leave the hospital with an infant and now their baby rolling off the bed confirms their belief that they have no parenting skills whatsoever.

I usually leave 6-month-old Cash on the rug because this is my 5th kid and I’ve got to prove that I’ve learned something. But the other day, I had him on a twin bed and I actually said to 3-year-old Chase, “Watch Cash for a second. I’ll be right back.”

Now Chase has a lot of talents like eating chicken nuggets, throwing a ball and he’s really good at saying funny sh*t. Like recently, after we tucked him in, he came down and said, “Tomorrow when I wake up and then have a nice day. Then after that, can I have a hot dog?”

But I wouldn’t say Chase is the king of safety. In fact, he’s pretty much the opposite. And childcare might not be his calling either.

Because 3 seconds later, I came back into the room and and all I could see were baby Cash’s legs – sticking up between the wall and the bed. He had clearly taken a nose dive off the bed and got wedged between the wall and the bed.

I tried to pull Cash out but he was stuck.

(Afterward my twins reenacted me trying to pull Cash out.)

chase and harlowe bed

I panicked for a moment because I did not want to call Rick at work and say, “I know you have a 5 pm newscast but our 3-year-old was watching the baby and now the baby is trapped —  No, don’t send a camera crew.”

So I quickly took action. I lowered Cash to the ground, pulled out the bed and easily removed him. He was completely unharmed. I apologized to my sweet baby. Obviously in my 9 years of parenting, I have learned very little but there is still hope. He smiled at me so it seems like everything is cool with us.

baby cash

mama bird notes:

I am currently working with The Mother Company and Rubio Studios. The Mother Company is all about helping parents raise good people. They have some awesome DVD’s and books for children tackling topics like feelings, bullying and personal safety. I reviewed a 3-pack DVD collection that would make a wonderful Christmas gift and I am also giving one of these 3-packs away. Just click here to read my review and enter the giveaway. xo

13 Responses to your kid fell off the bed? my kid fell off the bed!

  • Whahahahaha…. The Bunny launched herself off the changing table. Onto my wood floors. First time mom. The day before she was completely immobile; ‘today’ she was launching herself off changing tables.
    She spent a lot of time on the floor after that.

  • Kira says:

    I remember baby sitting one time, I was reading to the older kid and the younger one suddenly called out to look at him… he was almost at the top of a bookcase – having climbed out his playpen first…. I don’t think I’ve ever moved faster!!

    After that I always enquired abo
    ut ‘climbers’!!

    • Angie says:

      Okay for some reason it is not posting my explanation! lol the first time I was right there and I had sat her up. I went to put something in our bin under the bed and she dove forward. Luckily I was there and managed to sort of catch her body but her forehead still hit the ground. The second time I like to believe wasn’t my fault. Although it’s still pretty awful it happened twice, you would think I had learned my lesson the first time around right?! Well, I had an exhausting day and fell asleep on the bed trying to put her to sleep and next thing I hear, bam! Hannah had rolled off the bed. I immediately leaped and because this was her second time, she had acquired falling-off-the-bed skills and landed on her hands and knees. I still cried, both times, like a BABY! I am expecting my second child and I vow this will not happen to him/her! Well….hopefully it won’t! *I hope this actually posts this time!*

  • steph says:

    I turned around in the attic once….and saw the top of my ‘crawler’s’ head at the top step…it was all i could do not to scream; fortunately i got her up in the attic with me. (Yes, slow learner here–me, not her—she had already scaled a bookcase months before this happened. But, you know, she lived to tell about it—to her two kids.)

  • Ann says:

    My kid rolled off a hotel bed and dropped ..oh 3 feet and onto his head. He puked, but only because my immediate reaction was to force-nurse him. He was fine, I’m still recovering.

    Mere hours before that his 3 year old brother pooped on the floor. Of a funeral home.

    Thanks for the memories!

  • Megan says:

    My daughter slipped and fell on ice on the walk to school today. Feeling badly that I didn’t drive and that it’s not even winter yet!

  • Steph says:

    Oh, I remember that terrible feeling when you realized baby has fallen off the bed! and if you hadn’t posted this, Cash would never find out:) well, maybe the twins would tell him. They are adorable and talented “re-enactors.”

  • Mary Clare says:

    This post reminds of Anne Lamot’s story in Operating Instructions about how her baby sleeping next to her in bed rolled off the bed and under it. She didn’t know where he was when she woke up the next day and looked around for him. In my house babies falling off the bed is practically a right of passage. I felt terrible, when it happened. They don’t remember it now, though.

  • Marinka says:

    The good thing about having older kids is that I can’t remember who fell off the bed and when and how many times. Maybe that’s the good thing about being old and senile.

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kelcey kintner