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Dec
01
2010

A woman came up to me at my local coffee shop (Doesn’t coffee shop sound folksy? Fine. It was a Starbucks) and she said, “Are those your twins? I have 14 month old twins.”

From that moment, I listened to everything she said. Because in my crazy world, she is an expert. She’s 8 months ahead of me and knows twin secrets. Or at least I suspect that she does.

She promised me things will get much easier when…

1. The twins start sitting up.

2. When they can hold a bottle.

Except I primarily nurse so that bottle thing is not going to help me unless they are holding my Corona Light for me so that my hands are free for the remote and The New York Post.

I was about to ask her some follow up questions when this twins’ expert abandoned me (or as she might refer to it, grabbed her coffee and went home).

Speaking of the twins, I started taking Chase and Harlowe to a weekly morning playgroup with other babies. It’s their first official activity.Β  It was either that or a junior golf league. And honestly, I don’t feel like investing in baby golf clubs.

One of the moms from the playgroup works so she emailed me, saying that we should get together on a Saturday sometime.

Which sounded great.

Except this woman has one cute adorable baby boy.

One.

Not a whole damn posse.

So I wrote back, “I’m around on Saturdays (my husband works) but you probably don’t want to get together with me because in addition to my twins, I have a 4 year-old and a 6 year-old.”

And she replied, “Wow, your hands are totally full!!!! :)”

That was it.

Which we all know means, “You’re right. I don’t want to get together with you.”

At least she added the smiley face.



31 Responses to wonder twin powers, activate!

  • I’m glad you were given some of the twin secrets without having to surrender your soul (or did you?). I hate when people make the “hands full” remark. I usually get it when I have my four out with me in public, so I know they are saying it because I look totally frazzled and like I wish my full hands maybe belonged to someone else for a moment. Or…, maybe they think I just really have it together. Yeah.

  • Kerri says:

    Kelcey, I know exactly what you are talking about! I also volunteer helping moms with breastfeeding. The may have other children around the age of one (or in the case of my 2 sets of twins, two) children around the same age as mine. I have to then explain that in fact I have more than one or two other children. I have a feeling she would have skipped the smiley face when I mentioned I have 11. Oh and that doesn’t include the lovely children we also baby-sit for so it is not unusual to have a few extras in the house. One day it was eight extra. Now before anyone has a fit & goes to push send finish reading. Included in my 11 (the oldest is 20 & living near-by in her own home). I also have an 18 year old, a 16 year old, a 13 year old who are excellent at caring for children. In fact they had to teach their “Babysiiter Course” Instructors how to put a cotton diaper on a doll! The babysitting is casual and not a “home day-care” though we do activities. We also live on 3 wooded acres with lots of room for kids to play & explore & we are 200 feet from the road with a very long drive-way and a large turn-around so they never have to leave to go on a bike ride! We also have a huge wooden play structure and another swing set plus tons of bikes & ride on toys. Oh and dogs, cats, rabbit and horses (the hamster was found dead only a few minutes ago, he was over 4 years old so died of VERY OLD age…well for a hamster!)

    Needless to say in most cases friends come to our house. Funny thing is the visiting children tend to love being here. They beg to come & visit! It is the parent(s) that tend(s) to be a bit over-whelmed! It is actually pretty quiet and the kids are excellent at sharing, taking turns and negotiating. We also have children who are quite happily step forward to model a more desirable behaviour! A dear friend was visiting me one time. Between the two of us there were about 20 kids. We actually sat and ate snacks and had a cup of tea and didn’t need to get up once as they all got along so incredibly well. Not once did anyone come to us to say they were bored. I think my kids told them if they say that I find some NOT boring activity for them such as cleaning out the kitty litter or mucking out the stalls or paddock & there is always laundry that needs to be washed &/or dried &/or folded!

    I do have a few friends that don’t mind having us over…with all the kids. Mind you they wil eat anything and that makes life easier for everyone! Others invite only my husband & I over for adult time & that is okay too! I get other adult time by doing other volunteer work with activities my kids do. This all came as my kids got older!

    There may be friend out there just waiting to find you & she will be in a similar situation and you will connect. I found my dearest friends through LLL and then others through my kids’ activities.

    Kerri: mom to A: g-20, E:g-18, M:g-16, J:b-14, C & S (id twins:TTTS: g-10), T (b-7) & foster M:(g-10), S:(b-8), G & T (frat. twins: b-4)

  • maura says:

    I love the instant bond of twin parents.
    While strolling our 3 year olds at Disney this summer, I had many twin parents give give me the “head nod”
    You know, the yeah-I-know-you-and-your-life nod.

    It is like having friends all everywhere.

    Take it from me, Mom of 4 year old girls… milestones: sitting up, holding bottles, getting into their own car seats, potty trained… and that’s all I know.

  • OHmommy says:

    When I mentioned that my third child really doesn’t have too many friends someone suggested a find a playgroup to enroll her in.

    I can’t imagine anything worst than sitting around for 2 hours with new moms with only one child. I remember those playgroups – they were life saving at one point. But now, I can’t imagine sitting for hours watching kids play. I have too much to do.

  • Lisa says:

    I craved older twin mom advice when my 2 were little and I also wanted to be told that it will get easier and we will survive b/c I never believed those two things would be true. They are 20 months old now and we are just starting to get the hang of it πŸ˜‰ P.S. I have twins and my last name is Powers – no lie.

  • Emma says:

    I have two 4 months old and live in NYC. My friend (also NYC) has twins and a 7 yr old so if we get together we could start our own play group!!

    LMAO about the corola light comment!

  • When mine were 1,2 and 3 I just accepted the fact that we weren’t going to get any invitations to anywhere fun for some time, but that was ok. Once we did set up play dates with other mommies with kids, our group would be large sometimes too large. We as mommies never had a time to,”hang out,’ because we would have 6, 7 and sometimes 8 or nine kids all together and we couldn’t get a word in edgewise. The play date ends up getting a count down till we are out of there. SO please don’t be bumbed, play dates are overrated, and soon enough your kids will be entertaining each other. Stick to the friendships you have blogging. I promise you are not missing anything.

  • Diane says:

    Be patient, in a few years, those older siblings in the possee will be a huge draw because they can entertain the younger kids while you and said friend enjoy a cocktail. Just move that Saturday morning get together to Saturday afternoon and the weekends won’t be such a lonely endeavor.

  • misty says:

    Maybe she was just being nice and not pushing it. Maybe she thought you were nicely trying to get out of it… because four kids, that’s not so bad… Perhaps you can hang around the BUX for mighty twin mom to return and ask her what she thinks… πŸ™‚

  • Leigh Ann says:

    Isn’t it awesome? You can go up and talk to anyone who has twins and it’s like you’re instantly friends. With mine being 2.5, I love seeing new twin parents so I accost them with my know it all attitude and tell them “you WILL sleep again.” But you already know that, being a recipient of said know it all attitude.

    My favorite comment? When they see my twins and the 9 month old and say something like, “And you went for it again?” Or a friend who said, “I just thought that since you already had 2 you were done!” #1: No one informed me of the quota. #2: Yes, please make me feel worse about the fact that it was not planned — not so bad now, but when I was in my early pregnancy and still pretty upset about the whole thing, it really pissed me off. Lucky for me, she turned out to be a total gem.

  • Nancy Walton says:

    Most excellent post! Once again you’ve proven that whether the reader is a parent of twins, a parent of a single, or even a non-parent (like me), the pictures you paint with your blog are always a universally enjoyable experience! P.S. the Corona reference was a highlight for me, too πŸ™‚

  • Lu says:

    That’s what went wrong with the breastfeeding at my house. I needed to have the baby hold the beer, not the remote. Silly me. It would have given him a head start on the bottle holding aspect of life and not the couch potato aspect. I’d hang out with you and your posse any day.

  • annie says:

    Too funny! I used to run into that with my youngest two. When I brought a 1 yr old to a play date for my 2 yr old it freaked people out. Good for you for being up front…LOL!

  • Ugh. Another story of kids screwing up a perfectly good social life.

    Oh and that line about the Corona might possibly be the best joke you have written to date. Which means I might have to use it at a holiday party. Oh don’t worry. I will buy the rights off you. I hear you can be paid in babysitting right?

    πŸ™‚

  • Mom on the Verge says:

    I was almost banned from mommy-and-me baby story time at the library beause it was a one-on-one mommy-baby activity. And I had TWINS. Pardonnez-moi? I can tandem nurse. Dontcha think I can handle two babies on my lap at once? They relented. πŸ˜‰

    And she’s probably more afraid her house isn’t child-proofed enough for your herd. Invite her over!

  • Valerie says:

    I love it, “herd”, that’s how I refer to mine these days (5, 3, and 9 mo x2). πŸ™‚ I love your posts and I think I may have to use the Corona/remote line myself this holiday season.

  • I simply love that she rethought her invitation when you spilled the beans. Listen, you can come to my house any time with all of them. That is, if you enjoy pugs french-kissing you and your children.

  • Audra says:

    This made me laugh. People are frustrating! I am always so excited when you have new posts. I skim my RSS reader to see if you have new hilarious stories posted before I read my usual other stuff.

  • The “you really have your hands full” thing always sounds funny to me. Who doesn’t? But I don’t get invited over to people’s homes all that often with my kids either. I still don’t know how you do the nursing thing full time with twins. My best friend did it too. Super women…


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