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Hard drive of my computer: Dead.

Cell phone dropped in toilet: Dead.

Replacement phone: Was working. Now not so much.

Double replacement phone: Still in action. That’s all I’m going to say. Please don’t jinx it.

I’ve been stalking our LA friend, Wass, because he’s a big Mac genius and I’ve needed immediate assistance with my computer. The poor guy spent so much time trying to fix my technical problems that I think he memorized my last post. When I told him he was my techno hero, he modestly proclaimed to only be a sleep sack maniac. Photo of Wass in his sleep sack, hopefully coming soon.

I get so tense when technology fails me. Do you think our great great great grandparents flipped out over communication breakdowns?

Ophelia: Phillip, I just can’t take it anymore. This feathered quill pen has broken again! It’s making me crazy. Why didn’t we spend the extra 3 cents on the goose feather pen? Why must you be such a cheap bastard and settle for the turkey feathers? They just never last.

Phillip: Honey, you’re right.

Ophelia: And the pony express has been atrocious this year. My sister didn’t get my letter for three months. THREE months. My god, she thought the plague had gotten me.

Phillip: Honey, I will fix it. I promise. The pen. The ponies. We’ll fix all of it.

It must have bummed them out too. Perhaps you just noticed that I was not a history major in college.

Speaking of LA (well, I was speaking of it like six paragraphs ago), Rick’s best friend surprised us and flew into town from California for a quick visit (what a cool jet setter). We decided to host an impromptu brunch (ok, we were pressured into but still happy to do it).

Suddenly, I was panicked about the state of our apartment.

So I went on a hiding binge, stuffing crap into drawers and pushing junk into cabinets. You’ll notice this crafty, secret spot I found next to the bed to hide a few boxes.


Of course, when I do this sort of thing for company, I actually become convinced that I really did organize and clean out everything. Until my husband happens to mention that he REALLY can’t get into his side of the bed.

Damn. Why does he have to be such a pansy?! The apartment looks so good.

kids.jpgSo everyone showed up and played nicely. That would be six girls (between the ages of 11 months and 4 1/2).

No girls gone wild or girls behaving badly or anything. A real polite bunch.

For the first two hours, Dylan didn’t want anyone there or anyone playing with her toys or anyone talking to her parents. After that, I think she had a pretty good time.

So did the rest of us. And if anyone noticed the boxes hidden next to the bed, they were too courteous to mention it.

And speaking of snowsuits – wait, I haven’t mentioned snowsuits? Well, I meant to. Here’s a shot of 3 1/2 Dylan sleeping in her 1 year-old sister’s snowsuit.


I don’t know about you but nothing lulls me into a deep slumber quicker than an extra snug down parka.

mama bird notes

MP is the lucky birdie to win our super fab giveaway! Thank you to all the amazing companies who participated:

Posh Squeaks baby
Pottery Barn Kids
EmmaLu Designs
Smart Mom

Contributing mama Daphne Biener is back with her heroic efforts to save a life (it’s a bird but still). Click on “contributing mamas” to read more.

The results of our mama poll are in…

What do you and your spouse fight about the most? 19% of you argue about house keeping. 16% fight about in laws. Another 16% say it’s the money issue. 13% argue over child rearing, 9% about work and another 6% about sex. 3% of you do battle over your housing situation. 12% say you and your spouse fight about everything (too tired and too cranky). Finally, 6% of you checked the “other” box. Of course, now I’m dying to know what on earth you argue about.

Check out our latest poll. How far would you go for a sniffles free winter with your kids? Click on, “your mama says what?” and give us the mama dish.

17 Responses to woman on the verge of a technical breakdown

  • Kristen says:

    So sorry to hear about your technical problems. I hope things get better soon. I love your dialogue between your great great great grandparents. Are those really their names? I love it! Of course it reminds me of my favorite author Jane Austen. Can you imagine writing with a quill? Yikes!

  • Abby Siegel says:

    That was hilarious. I'm sure Wass will be able to save the day. Either day or write you a fantastic screenplay based on the screwball comedy called your technical issues. Good luck to that!

  • sam says:

    paolo is also sometimes not that into guests. he will start waving at our visitors and saying bye and then tell them that he is going to walk them to the door now. (having learned that you walk a guest to the door when they are leaving, except that they're not leaving.) actually, now that i think about it, he really only does this after someone has stayed a LONG time, maybe he's onto something…oh and sleep sack wass photos are a must!!

  • Tully's Mama says:

    So I gather harboring cardboard boxes or hiding unmentionables seconds before the first guest arrives means you DON'T have it all together, all the time. Thanks for pissing on my completely inaccurate image of my Manhattan Mamabird. Are you going to tell me you live in the Bronx now, too?

  • I often wonder how I ever survived before the internet and computer and cell phones (uh, because I'm old enough to remember that!) and then I wonder about the poor people who went before… it gives me the shivers, I tell you.

    I love your stories, Kelcey!! You guys are hilarious… 🙂

  • wa says:

    I think Mercury's in retrograde right now, which means communication breakdowns. (I lived in L.A. long enough to feel comfortable saying such stuff.) So really, it's completely out of your control. Just tell everyone that you can't call them back until the planets realign.

  • Auntie T says:

    I often yearn for simpler times like just 2 years ago when i faxed in all my orders!

    Now I have to learn yet another system and pay my techno expert to set my MacBook up with a so unfriendly Pc system. Really can't they all just get along and "play nice" like the girls! Dylan looks just like you did in a sleeper! Love the pics and the quilt! Love the pics and the quilt!!

  • Daphne says:

    I personally love your historical perspective…we often harken back to the days of yore…you know, back when kids listened and walked to school in the snow and all!

  • Kelcey says:

    no, no, those aren't the real names of my great, great, great grandparents.

    But I did write this post with a quill pen and then carbon copied it to my computer.

  • i think i'd give up all our gadgets and maybe even indoor plumbing if i could get a yes-husband like Phillip.

    love the cleaning/hiding tip!

    great snowsuit pics. when our girls got their winter boots this year, boots were worn to bed for about a week. something about that fake-shearling…

  • shay says:

    Remember when we used to mail letters? And write? With a pen? Crazy talk.

    I feel lost and naked when my email goes down or my phone is dead. I'd be in trouble too if my hard drive crashed.

    Oh and I love sleeping in teeny snowsuits too lol. Too cute!

    And I clean the same way. I think it qualifies as clean.

  • mp says:

    I don't win anything..ever!! Well maybe a free ticket on scratchers..but that is it. Woo hoo… I have some very happy new mommy friends that are going to be THRILLED..I love giving.

    I have never lost a computer..knock on wood…

  • Kelsey Johnson says:

    Our home computer is on the blink, too! I just met with the guru and he is not sure what is wrong with it. He did, however, fix it! Yeah- hope yours recovers!

  • Marie says:

    My kids are extremely healthy, so them getting sick hasn't been an issue. I, on the other hand, have been sick for nearly three months now with pneumonia, pleurisy, postnasal drip, and now pregnancy.

  • Madmad says:

    I had something funny to say about my own I.T. guy, but my daugher is pressuring me about getting off the computer so she can do homework. Homework! For the love of Pete! In my day, we used a damn quill for homework. How'm I supposed to blog?

  • Jennifer says:

    Bless Phillip for fixing those ponies. Hee.

    The side-of-the-bed-people-can't-see-right-away spot is my favorite, favorite "clean the house" place. Shhh. Don't tell!

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kelcey kintner