When I was a kid in the 1970’s, water was not easily accessible.
For example, if you were in the car and told your mom you were thirsty, she’d do one of the following…
1. Tell you to use the water fountain when you reached your destination in only 346.7 miles.
2. Tell you to drink your own saliva.
3. Throw an open can of warm Tab at your head to get you to shut up.
These were thirsty times.
But then some brainiac came up with the idea of selling water in a bottle so all of a sudden, everyone had water! All the time! This seemed very good. But it wasn’t.
It has only created a bunch of water addicted children. The minute kids get in a car now, they have barely buckled their 17 point harness when they demand a snack, entertainment and some refreshing cold spring water.
I am pretty sure my 5-year-old thinks I have a KitchenAid Refrigerator with a water dispenser in our minivan passenger seat.
I get water addiction. I went through a dark h20 period where I attempted to consume 3 liters of this fancy fresh-from-the-mountain-spring-water every day. Someone very earthy and spiritual advised me that this brand had magical minerals and staying fully hydrated (apparently defined as having to pee every 23 minutes) would put me on a path towards enlightenment. Which is sort of what happened except for the enlightenment part.
I was about to start carrying my own portable potty when I decided it was just best to stop drinking SO MUCH WATER.
I still carry a reusable water bottle but I’ve kicked my mountain spring water obsession.
And I have something to say to all the thirsty children of America sitting in the backs of cars everywhere. Just look out the window and be quiet.
You can get a drink when we get there.
Only 346.7 miles left.
P.S. I may have been spotted from time to time transporting four separate water bottles for my children on even the shortest of road trips but this can not be confirmed.
33 Responses to when did our kids get so thirsty?
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kelcey kintner
My grandmother did the Tab thing! And created an addict. I had, no lie, the caffeine shakes for days after we moved to France thanks to the forced cold-turkey quit of a 3-can-a-day habit. : (
I am with you on this one! I’m such a sucker that I bought bigger water bottles for my kids because I felt like I was constantly having to refill them. By the way, the Camelbak .5 liter bottle is excellent…although a bit heavy when carrying several of them full.
It is definitely a conspiracy – the minute everyone is buckled they are dehydrated and starving (even if they drank/ate the second before they were strapped in). I too may have been seen with water bottles and a snack bag . . . xoxo
Oh I have so much to look forward to! 🙁
Hey, maybe we should carry mini shovels and have the kids dig their own wells! That will double as our graves.
I so get it! My standard reply to “Can I have some water?” while in the car is:
“Sure thing! Turn around and grab it from the fridge!”
Hilarious! I love it.
P, you are FUNNY. xo
Seriously, I completely agree! (about the 17-point-harness thing too). It makes me crazy; I thought it was just my children.
Lecture #467 around here is “When I was a kid, no one ever drank or ate ANYTHING in the car.” The kids know it by heart.
Yup, I wasn’t allowed either, but MAN did I make up for it once I got my own car.
Bahahahaha!!! YOU. ARE. SO. AWESOME!!!! Are we there yet?
SO true…my 2 year old arrives at my daughters school like a marathon runner ” Mommy I need water NOW” and we have to go straight to the water fountain ( that walk from the car to the school drums up quite the thirst in a 2 year old!!)
I so feel your pain/annoyance. The second I pick up our girls from school they are thirsty & starving–despite the fact that I packed them a water bottle, breakfast, snack and lunch. I admire my girlfriends who just say no to eating & drinking in the car but I can’t bear the whining.
Funny, I thought it was just up here at altitude that we were water-obsessed!
I think that somewhere there is a mommy in the witness protection program because she is ground zero for the snack-totin’ mamma. Seriously – when did it start, the mom-as-snack-bar thing? Water, snacks, baggies of this and that – why why why? Was this trend in fact started by the plastic-baggy industry? And furthermore, why, despite the fact that I hate the constant eating and drinking, do I continue to toss a granola bar (ie, candy bar with oats sprinkled on top) in my bag “just in case” someone gets hungry? I am weak, weak, weak. (Maybe I’m thirsty…quick, someone pass me a water!)
I know it is crazy, I think it started out of necessity to keep from buying crap everywhere we go. Pass the water
Love it!! I’m soooo right there with you!! I was at my desk laughing out loud at your comment. I have trash cans/bags in my car just for this…and yet why does the trash NEVER make it in them? LOL Oh that reminds me…one more thing on my list this weekend. CLEAN OUT THE NASTY CAR! LOL
We just bought the 8 millionth Naglene bottle (to replace a lost one) so we can have portable water. Why? Because it’s the cups that kill me. They take a NEW cup EACH time they want water. There are cups EVERYWHERE – counter, backyard, garage, front porch, bedroom, cars, sandbox, Cozy Coupes and basement. ARGH! I swear I say, “Use your water bottle!!!” to a child grabbing a new cup about 50 times a day. And now the toddlers are grabbing cups because they’re so much cooler than their sippy cups. Hydration drives me nuts!
i am constantly saying to my children “When i was growing up i didn’t always have a beverage at my disposal!” Of course i’m usually saying this while pouring them a drink, but, whatever….
I know, I’ve finally told my older two that 1) they can get their own drinks — they only spill about 10% of the time and 2) they have to drink it in the kitchen. I’m not a drink delivery system! Not anymore… except for the baby. Maybe I can train one of them to deliver his drinks… I think I’m onto something.
Is it bad that I’M the one that’s water obsessed? Gotta have my water bottle with me at all times.
my husband has declared the endless beverage preparation and delivery that goes on in our home, particularly at bedtime (i realize this sounds self-defeating in more than one way even as i type this, but don’t ask) sisyphean.
sometimes i think that it should almost make me feel better, that he has found such a beautiful, mythical descriptor for the endlessly mundane work of what is, essentially, fetching water from a well. sadly, it does not.
Their carseats even come with cup holders now. Lucky bastards.
Cracking me up, as usual!
TAB! omg. that was the only soda my mom would allow in the house and it was only for my dad… someone told me they still sell it?? i lug around water bottles for me and the girls all f-ing day. and every day atleast one has spilled in every. single. bag I own. unreal. spill proof my ass.
OH my gosh. I’m sending this post to my mom. We are water obsessed. She has made me water obsessed. “Give the kids water!” “They need water, they were outside playing!” “Are the kids asleep? Did you give them water?” My son: “Yiayia! I need water!”
My mom: You’ve never seen a person run so fast to get a person water before.
And of course, I cannot get in my car without at least three bottles of water now… sigh.
I have girlfriend that would bring provisions (snacks and drinks) and she would dole them out BEFORE we even leave the neighborhood. Its a small community of 50 homes!!! It would make me crazy because I didnt do that for my kids.
We can leave a restaurant after a meal and start a two-hour long car trip, and my children will ask for a snack and something to drink before we pull out of the parking lot. We can leave immediately after lunch or breakfast, and they are opening the fruit snacks before we hit the highway. I’m glad they can at least fend for themselves now, and are usually willing to hand their baby brother something to eat. I don’t have to chuck things at them from the front seat anymore.
OMG, yes! Even with sports. I played a lot of sports when I was a kid and I never once brought water to a single practice or game. There was a water fountain that we got to visit exactly one time. And we had to stand in line! And if we were outside, well it was only an hour or two until we got some water at home.
Now my daughter has to bring a water bottle to SWIM TEAM practice. She’s in a GIANT hole FULL of water and she has to have a bottle at the end of the lane so she can take a sip at each lap.
And the first word of one of my kids? Fursty. Oy.
Yup, my kids often are wailing about water in the back seat and we are literally 5 minutes from home…as if I have water coming out an appendage or something. I like that they like water mind you…just think lack of patience is more the issue.
good to know my children aren’t alone in their pursuit of being the most well hydrated children, but only in the car.
I make my five yr old fill up his drink bottle with tap water before we leave the house… everytime, he just does it now, if he forgets and pulls the I’m thirsty…. i can turn around and say well you should have bought your drink bottle 😉