The other night Rick got home from work and I greeted him by saying, “I need food. I need a nap. And I need to get outside and take an exercise walk.”
I went grocery shopping instead. At 9 pm. At least there was food there. That’s how things sort of go with a new baby.
By the way, there are some very interesting people that go food shopping at 9 pm.
Like a guy behind me in the check-out line with a t-shirt that read…. “I Want To F ck. All I need is U. ” Get it? It’s pretty cerebral. Makes me wish I was still dating so I could scoop up that charmer before any other ladies get their hands on him.
Meanwhile – I’ll tell you what I don’t need.
I don’t need to hear anymore about Michael Douglas and oral s%x. If you missed it, he just announced that his throat cancer was caused by partaking in previously mentioned activity. Apparently, throat cancer can be caused by the human papillomavirus (HPV), which can be transmitted by oral s%x.
I admire his courage in admitting this because it highlights a serious health epidemic. But STILL. I had a very small window for hearing about Michael Douglas and oral s%x and it was pretty much the year Romancing the Stone came out.
Oh and just when I was trying to recover from that, a photo of a Taco Bell employee licking a stack of shells went viral.
The last time and only time I ate at a Taco Bell was in 1997 and I’m still wigged out by this photo. Maybe we should go back to discussing Michael Douglas and his bedroom activities.