On Sunday, we spent the day in Manhattan.
First, we went to see “Knuffle Bunny” (a musical based on that adorable Mo Willems book). Dylan thought it was hilarious. Summer looked somewhat somber throughout but afterward, declared that she loved it and that it was too short. The musical pretty much painted dads to be lovable morons and moms to be super smart shopaholics. So after our little trip to the 1950’s, we went back to our old hood in the West Village.
It felt so good to be back in the city. We bumped into a lot of old friends and a former acquaintance who said, “Do you own a minivan now?”
I replied, “No. And if I did, it sure wouldn’t be that gold one I saw parked on Hudson.”
After we played in the park, we headed home and Rick pulled the minivan over in the Meat Packing District so I could grab pizza for the girls. The pizza place is just around the corner from a restaurant called Bagatelle.
Bagatelle is this place where people go for brunch. But this is not normal Sunday brunch. You get there in the late morning or early afternoon and you eat, drink, dance and party until you stumble out of the place at about 6 pm. It’s like a night club you visit in the middle of the day.
Mark it down as reason number 1, 478 that New York City is ridiculous and awesome.
So while Rick was waiting for me, a man shuffled out of Bagatelle and knocked on our car window.
Rick put the window down.
“Union Square,” said the man.
“What?” said Rick.
“Take me to Union Square. I will pay you $150 bucks.”
“What are you talking about?”
Slurring, “I want to procure your services.”
“I’m just a dad. I’ve got four kids in the back. This is not a limo service.”
How drunk do you have to be to use the word procure? Maybe “procure” is sweeping Europe. I have no idea.
And who confuses a gold minivan with a car service or a taxi?
I guess the same drunk guy who uses “procure.”
And finally, how much does Rick regret not dumping my ass, putting that wasted guy in the passenger seat and making $150 bucks on a seven minute ride to Union Square.
On a related note, Rick is now running a limo service out of Manhattan if you need to get to the airport.*
*That was a joke. Please don’t call us for rides to the airport. Unless you’re drunk and in possession of a lot of cash.
mama bird notes:
On The Mouthy Housewives today, what do you do when you know a husband is cheating but his wife is in the dark? We have the answer.