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Jan
31
2014

I know some of you will soon be heading to Florida to escape the freezing temperatures and while you’re here, you might be inclined to take an exercise class.

Now you may think you can just grab a water bottle, throw on a pair of sneakers and show up. Oh no. Getting ready for the gym Florida style is sort of like getting ready to attend the Oscar’s but instead of walking the red carpet, some woman will yell at you to do 100 squats and then scream, “Do you feel it?!!”  At which point, you are required to shout back, “Woohoo!!!”

I’d hate for you to stick out like a tourist so here are a few tips if you want to blend in with the South Florida natives.

1. Show up to the gym in high heels. Begrudgingly put on sneakers just before class begins. Know in your heart that you could spin in Christian Louboutin shoes.

2. Be born with fabulous boobs or get a boob job prior to class.

3. Arrive at your cardio class with a blowout and full makeup. How much makeup? Think one of the Kardashians. Not Rob. The other ones. Don’t even bother putting your hair in a ponytail. Just wear it down and pretend like it’s not driving you completely bat crazy.

4. As for apparel, a lot of women go for these one piece jumpsuits as a way to show off their sick (that’s a good thing) bodies.

$T2eC16N,!w0FI,BNUCbTBSdZqrBD!g~~60_57

$T2eC16VHJG!E9nm3p32QBRIZ,V2D8Q~~60_57

(I wear one and then layer a muumuu over it.)

5. If a spandex bodysuit is too much material for you, here is another popular alternative….

tahitianleopard-capri01

6. During class, it’s important to check your phone constantly. Just because you’re in the middle of a workout, doesn’t mean you can’t take a break and play Candy Crush during the hard parts. Plus this cuts down on that sweating thing which can threaten the bounce of your blowout.

7. Never finish a class. At some point, during the abs or stretching, collect your things and leave because you’ve got stuff to do. Like maybe drop by the cafe. Or the salon.

8. After exercising, shower and put on jeans and a light sweater because with a low of 83 degrees, you don’t want to risk feeling chilled.

9. If possible, try to work out at a gated community that caters to the 65 plus. That way you get to hear the sweetest question there is… “Are you still in college?” Hug the 85 year-old woman who just said this to you.

Good luck out there and happy Florida fitness!


15 Responses to tips for working out florida style

  • Becky Ferguson says:

    Honestly, Kelsey? For real? The look so 1980!!!!!!! Here’s what I suggest—you need to find a meathead gym, like th one I go to, full of legitimate jocks and bodybuilders. They don’ care what you are doing. Or find a cross fit place (but be careful, sometimes I think Crossift is dangerous.). Then youn scan go in in you Pi Phi rush tshirt, a pair of nike tempo shorts and be out of there in 45 minutes.

  • Alex says:

    oh my gosh, i think i had that tropical themed one back in high school! i wore it to my jane fonda classes. all that’s missing is the the sweat band for the head (a la john mc enroe).

  • Becky says:

    I’m glad I’m in Wisconsin where if you show up for your exercise class without cheese dripped down the front of your Brewer t-shirt, you might be mistaken for the instructor.

  • daphne says:

    I’m sure I couldn’t pull off the hair and makeup before the gym…but I do like the part about getting asked if I’m in college.

  • Princess Judy says:

    “How much makeup? Think one of the Kardashians. Not Rob. The other ones.”

    Bawhahaha!

    What’s a gym? What is this ‘exercise’ stuff you talk of? It sounds dangerous.

  • Lanie says:

    I dont think i could pull that off. No gym for me if I am in FL – I will stick to running outside by myself (w/out make up & my hair in a ponytail). xo

  • I fear it’s not restricted to Florida either. I was leaving the change room in our local Durban gym and a woman was applying her make up so I assumed she was off to work after her morning work out… until she arrived next to me for a step class…


kelcey kintner


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