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I was looking at some old photos of my daughter Dylan when she was 4.  We used to put her to bed and when we would check on her, she would be wrapped in winter garb.

dylan sleeping 3

Dylan sleeping 1

dylan sleeping 2

We lived in an apartment so we kept all the winter stuff in her closet bedroom. Something tells me she didn’t immediately go to sleep after we tucked her in.

But lately, at the age of 8, she seems so big, with a lot less winter attire at bedtime. And she’s opinionated. And very dissatisfied with my parental decisions.

Once again, I’m starting to feel sorry for my mother.

She  thinks it’s an outrage that I don’t let her wear leggings to school. (Dylan, not my mother.) “BECAUSE EVERY OTHER GIRL DOES.” Maybe I should?

She thinks it’s unconscionable (my word, not hers) that I won’t let her win a fish at the school fair. Why am I so anti-fish other than the fact that I don’t want to deal with the bowl, or the food or watch it swim sadly in circles or face the day Chase takes it out for a swim in the toilet?

She can not believe I won’t let her leave her bedroom windows open as far as they will go. She thinks my argument about not wanting the twins to fall from the 2nd floor is unconvincing. I’m pretty convinced.

She is devastated to not live right next door to her best friend. And to not have a bathroom attached to her bedroom. Because I guess those are equally as awful.

She thinks she should be allowed to drive even though I told her it’s really boring.

Dylan is an incredibly good child. She does her homework. She finishes her chores. She is ridiculously sweet with the twins. Even her bouts of anger end with apology notes showing great maturity.

I guess I just didn’t expect her fierce desire for independence to start so soon. I thought I had a little more time left.  I just wish more love was coming my way, and a few less complaints.

She is growing, changing, testing and at times, it’s exhausting.

But I keep loving her madly. Because that’s what parents do.

8 Responses to they just keep growing and changing

  • I want to cry for you. I’m dreading that time. The Bunny is already developing a very independent streak. She’s 4. I want her to stay 4 forever because I’m loving it. Except for the bits where I apparently don’t love her anymore because I won’t brush the Barbie’s hair/ let her play with knives/ insist I brush her hair/ etc.

  • Kelsey Kleiman says:

    I love seeing those old pictures of Dylan.
    Your kids are going to love reading your blog some day. It’s a real gift you’ll be giving them! I can really relate to this as Leila is 8 and starting to roll her eyes and fight with her sister but even 9 will be much different, I’m sure.

    Wondering why no leggings? With a long shirt?

    We only have one bathroom so I’m the one complaining the most in our house and Leila agrees that it sucks.

  • Mexmom says:

    My son is almost 7 and I can surely relate, how do I date to put limits on how much time he plays with the ipad or why can’t he own one like his cousin?

  • beachgirl says:

    Oh how I dread the day my daughter turns 8 as I have heard stories…..BUT the upside is it only seems to last for that one longgggggggg year and they are back to normal by 9….so hang in there…I think the leggings issue with you is that she wants to wear short tshirts over them right? wearing leggings as pants and not as leggings / tights? maybe I am wrong but I think this was your anti leggings stance?

    BTW she is so adorable in her winter garb…guess you should have turned up the heat? 🙂

  • Angie says:

    I think it’s okay to wear leggings as long as the tush is covered. I’m glad you’re letting your girls know at a young age what’s appropriate clothing for school. I wish those parents were doing the same where I work! Just this past week because of the warm weather these 8th grade girls come to school with very short shorts and spaghetti strap tanks on with cleavage showing! Had to have a talk with them about dress code and its not okay to come to school dressed as if they were going to the beach..

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kelcey kintner