My husband received a gift for his 40th birthday that has been sitting on our dresser.

See here it is….

bag

Inside the bag is a book from Barnes & Noble that he wants to exchange.

So day after day goes by and Rick never touches it. Despite the fact that there are 777 Barnes & Noble stores throughout the U.S. that would gladly take the book back. Yes, that’s the real number.

One day, I can’t take it anymore because I find clutter simply maddening. So I pick the bag up and….

IT’S EMPTY.

EMPTY. EMPTY. EMPTY.

I hunt my husband down.

“Honey, I just found your empty gift bag on the dresser.  If you returned the book, why did you just leave the bag there?” I ask him.

“I don’t know.”

“Why wouldn’t you throw it in the recycle bin?”

“I don’t know.”

Or put it in the closet with the other bags so we can reuse it?”

“I don’t know.”

“Seriously? You have no idea? No answers at all? I would just love to understand.”

“Nope. No answers. But if I come up with any answers, I’ll definitely let you know.”

Great. Totally look forward to that.

In other husband news… remember my sister’s husband Erik? For some reason that I can’t really remember, I always disguise his identity on this blog. Here he is with my mom’s dog Lilly (whose identity I obviously don’t protect and she probably resents me for it)…

erik with lilly

Well, I found out this weekend that Erik refuses to eat any food that’s “not prepared with love.” For example, if he’s having a fight with my sister and she makes him a tasty pulled pork sandwich with a lovely, tangy BBQ sauce for lunch, he won’t eat it. Not one tiny bite.

He says he can’t. Because it’s not prepared with love.

Yes, seriously.

At least I know… there is NO WAY Rick would ever turn down a tasty pulled pork sandwich with a lovely, tangy BBQ sauce. Even if it was also stuffed with a little frustration and annoyance.

mama bird notes:

So far I’m really not digging the new LA-based “Project Runway.” I mean, what happened to those challenges where they make a bridal gown out of scrap metal? This season is so painfully dull so far. But I’ll tell you who’s not boring… Wendi Aarons. No, she’s not a “PR” contestant (although that’s obviously going to happen in the future). Actually, she writes hilarious “PR” recaps on Reality Roadkill. Her posts are way better than the show. If you whisper Tim Gunn’s name in your sleep, you must check it out.

On another note, September is Ovarian Cancer Awareness month. And you can actually do something. Seventh Generation will give $1 to Ovarian Cancer Research (up to $22,000) for every person that clinks on this link and signs up. I did it. It’s super quick and you can also watch funny girl Jessica Bern as “Aunt Flo.”

Final note… Do you have a problem? Why not let The Mouthy Housewives solve it? We’ve got nothing else to do. Send an email to ask@mouthyhousewives.com.

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!