So after a two month hiatus, I finally went back to yoga class.
I got up at 6:15 in the morning and walked to the gym. In the dark. In the rain. In the cold.
But damn it, I got there. And the class started perfectly well.
Until smack in the middle of it, our yoga instructor suddenly stops and tells us all that a few days ago, she was hit by a car. Everyone just kind of stares at her. And no one knows what to say because we are mid sun salutation and it’s just the oddest time to bring this up.
Many minutes go by as she gives us a detailed account of the accident. She was crossing the street. The car actually ran over her. She was between the wheels. Screaming for help. She is fortunate to be alive.
I am horrified.
And very guilty. Because I really want her to stop talking and continue the class. You know, in a very compassionate way.
I’m wondering if I can at least do some stretching while I listen to this super scary tale.
And then she says something that makes absolutely no sense.
“I want to do something different today. I guess because of the accident. I don’t know. So let’s partner up.”
OH NO! Please don’t punish us with a partner. We weren’t driving the car. I’m sorry about the accident. I’m so glad you are ok. PLEASE don’t do this. I’ll chauffeur you around. Anywhere you want to go. Just please don’t make me -
The guy next to me offers to be my partner.
No offense to my very nice partner but if I’m going to touch some random guy, I want to be single, drunk and in the dark.
But it’s done. I’m nowhere near the door. There is no exit. I am so Kevin Costner. There is simply no way out.
So we sit inches apart, holding hands and do this leg stretching thing.
And then a back stretch (yes, holding hands AGAIN).
And then the teacher instructs us to “thank” our partner and believe me, I am THANKFUL – that it’s over.
You know what really pisses me off?
I’ll just bet my partner is complaining to his co-worker right now about the yoga girl with the super sweaty hands or something.
See – this is why it’s so much easier to just not go to the gym in the first place.
mama bird notes
Marinka won the Radio City Christmas Spectacular tickets. Congrats girl!
Johanna and Stephanie (Tyler’s mom) won the Darius Goes West DVDs! Congrats mama birds. Just send your address to firstname.lastname@example.org and I will send the videos along.
This week I’m giving away two $30 gift cards to The Children’s Place. This is a fabulous place to shop for kids. Super affordable and you can find some really cute stuff like darling pajamas and robes. Just leave a comment on the mama bird diaries this week and you are entered. Just mention your desperate desire for one of these gift cards so I know you are interested in the giveaway.