On Saturday, I drove up to the Berkshires for Rick’s cousin’s wedding. Rick was already there so I conquered the Massachusetts frontier myself.
The drive was super gorgeous and everything was going swimmingly until my directions said 20 East but apparently I was supposed to go 20 West. I drove 10 miles in the wrong direction before I encountered another human being. (I don’t know why people are so down on overpopulation – makes it much easier to ask for directions!) My potential savior looked a bit rough around the edges but I had 45 minutes to get to this wedding and no time to be picky about asking the unabomber’s nephew for assistance.
He directed me the right way and I made it on time.
The wedding ceremony took place in the woods.
It was very pretty.
Like in the 50s cold. I knew my open-toed shoes and bare legs were going to be trouble as soon as I spotted wedding guests in North Face jackets and boots…
The ceremony was so sweet and included the line, “May today be the day that you love each other the least.”
Which at first seems like a bummer to “love each other the least” but that means from this day on they will love each other more and more. Can you believe I processed all that with numb toes?!
The reception took place nearby in this quaint country lodge that had quirky touches like a photo of naked women in the ladies’ room – clearly taken before bikini waxes were the rage.
And on the bar, a penis glass.
That’s Wendi, Rick’s adorable cousin.
Now if you were at this wedding and you’re wondering, “Hey, why is Wendi on this blog and not me?!” – Ask yourself, did I make an effort to drink a gin and tonic out of a penis glass? No? Let that be a lesson for you. Wendi, thank you for going the extra distance. And for eating 47 caramels with me.
Don’t confuse cousin Wendi with bride Wendy…
Bride Wendy wore a lovely white dress and was never seen drinking from a penis glass.
I decided that this wedding was a perfect time to debut my new Paris Hilton pose for photographs…
See the similarity with the right arm position?
And just to clarify – Rick is not wearing an ascot around his neck. I made him wear my pashmina for a bit for reasons that are not entirely clear to me now.
We all did a lot of dancing. There was no band or DJ, just an iPod but strangely, we all applauded the iPod after every song. I mean, the iPod did perform really well.
We finally headed back to the hotel and drove home early the next morning. We even made a stop for barbeque on the way.
We brought some pulled pork home for my dad (who was very kind to babysit) and I can promise you that Big W’s Roadside BBQ is top notch.
Unfortunately, I can not vouch for Dawn’s Hair Studio.
mama bird notes:
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