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Nov
05
2010

I’ve been trying to think of some future jobs for 3 year-old Summer. Jobs where she doesn’t have to actually move because she’s not the walking or moving type. In fact, every morning when we walk Dylan from the car to school (about two blocks), Summer’s shrieks can be heard throughout the school yard.

“I CAN’T WALK. I CAN’T WALK. PICK ME UP. MY LEGS!!!! MY LEGS ARE HURTING. OH MY LEGS!!”

It’s very dramatic.

So I counter, “Honey, if you are having such a problem with your legs, then maybe you shouldn’t take gymnastics anymore. You should let your legs rest.”

“My legs don’t hurt at gymnastics,” she explains. And then she proceeds to throw herself at my feet and continue her tantrum. “OH MY LEGS!!!”

So no… she’s not running in the New York marathon this weekend.

So far potential future jobs for Summer include:

Toll collector: This seems like a good one.  Sit and collect money. But I fear EZ Pass will put an end to this ideal sedentary job. Damn you technology.

Queen: This seems perfect since Queens are always sitting around just wearing their crowns and have those ladies in waiting in case they need anything. Unfortunately Summer doesn’t have any royal blood and Craig’s List has an alarming lack of job postings for this type of work.

Seat Filler at the Oscars: Here’s a position where your entire job is to sit in a seat until a celebrity returns from the bathroom during this prestigious award show.  But the job is unpaid and only happens once a year. Not exactly a slam dunk in terms of making money.

Ok, that’s the whole list so far. I’ll keep working on it.

Meanwhile, Summer is coming up with other genius ways not to exert energy.

I took the girls for a walk this week so they could ride their bikes and Summer quickly discovered she could hold onto the double stroller and get a ride.

Because only a fool would peddle on her own.


20 Responses to the laziest girl on the planet

  • Steph says:

    She looks so innocent and wise at the same time. I understand this b/c my girls have no energy for walking with me but enthusiastically run miles for their PE coach. Go figure.

  • Tiffaney says:

    You just know she’s going to grow up to be a pedicab driver or Rockette or roller waitress or Search & Rescue.

    Or not.

  • OHmommy says:

    I wonder if there’s something in the water. My three year keeps complaining about “broken legs.” But her legs seems to work just fine at 4 am when they tip toe and sneak into my bed.

    I blame the Republicans for tainted water.

  • amourningmom says:

    The first time Alyssa screamed about her legs I took her to get new shoes. I thought maybe her shoes were too small and hurting her feet. Silly me. I think Alyssa & Summer just figure that they have their whole lives to walk so they should catch a ride while they can . . .

    P.S. I hope that Summer does not become a toll collector – that is always been on my list of really boring jobs (no offense to any toll collectors reading this :-))

  • Jen says:

    hmmm i’ll bet those legs don’t hurt when she’s jumping on the bed, or when there’s a bouncy castle in the vicinity! she’s adorable…

  • Amanda says:

    Are her arms OK? Because, then maybe she could be one of those waving hot dogs on the side of the road. Sitting in a chair, of course.

    Happy to find your blog~

  • Oz says:

    That is very, very clever.

    I’ve got another job – body double in a movie version of Cleopatra, but just for the scenes when Cleopatra is being fed grapes, or being carried around on a stretcher. Oh, or extra in a hospital show – she could fill up the other hospital beds and take a nap.

  • Aunt Marcia (Guess Whose?) says:

    Show her some very fat asses around town, and let her know they are from ‘not walking’ but sitting on them all day. She might be inspired to move those little legs.

  • johanna says:

    I hope my sister reads this post as Katherine went through the EXACT same phase. Seriously. Said her legs hurt and “I Can’t walk pick me up”!! It started to freak Erin out thinking something was really wrong…no, just didn’t want to walk!! i think Queen would be an awesome job.

  • I have a mommy friend who actually IS a seat filler at the Oscars. Seriously. Two years ago she got to sit next to Brad P and Angelina J, which I figure is a bit like being at the right hand of god. So frankly, Summer should just hang in there (or sprawl, as the case may be).

  • Loukia says:

    So cute. My kids too… the whining and complainging sometimes, you’d think they were little old men! The other day my 2 year old says: “I’m tired. I need to sit down. Rest my legs.” It was so sweet. 🙂


kelcey kintner


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