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We’ve been waiting for a few weeks now for our trampoline to be delivered to our new home.

My dad generously offered to buy us the SAFEST TRAMPOLINE ON THE PLANET. It’s one of those springless, double layered trampolines that hopefully means our family will avoid years of chiropractic work and lawsuits.

And as you can imagine, this kind of trampoline does not come cheap. I thought maybe my dad could just buy the $300 one from Walmart and we could use the rest of the money on higher education for my kids. But I knew my father would not go for this option since he had already outlined for my husband the best fire escape routes from our new home. My dad is serious about safety.

So the evening before our new super duper trampoline is supposed to be delivered and built in our yard, my dad just happens to mention in an email that it’s 14 feet in diameter. 14 feet? Only one word came to mind…


So I panicked.

I turned to my husband for some wise words.  He proclaimed that 14 feet sounded big, safe and fun and then went back to his hockey game.

I dragged him outside at 8 pm and we attempted to measure our yard in the dwindling daylight to see if it would even fit in our desired location. It seemed to. Sort of. Except for that tree. But it was hard to see in the dark.

I emailed a friend for support who immediately proclaimed that she would be willing to bring over the elephants and clown car.

I canceled the delivery and the entire next day was dedicated to “trampoline size obsession,” a serious but not well known disorder. Since Rick has Mondays off (because he works on Saturdays), we went to look at trampolines.  When I wasn’t worried about the right size, I obsessed over the bounce. Since no outdoor store will actually let a pregnant woman on a trampoline, I made Rick jump on different ones.

“Is it bouncy?”


“Super bouncy?”


“But maybe not enough bounce?”

“Definitely enough bounce.”

“How would you describe the bounce?”


“Do you feel like you have the right amount of room on the trampoline or too much room?”

“Exactly the right amount of room.”

“Doesn’t it look gigantic? It’s gigantic.”

“It looks gigantic and perfect.”

After much debate, we are sticking with the 14 foot trampoline. Mostly because we’re pretty almost sure it fits in the designated spot in our yard. It’s slightly safer than the 12 foot one. It’s available now.  And the added bonus that I already have experience as a circus ringmaster.

26 Responses to the day i became a trampoline lunatic

  • Coma Girl says:

    I’m with Bitsy, I thought there would be a photo. Bummer.

    Happy jumping! And have you checked with your home owner’s insurance? Ours wouldn’t let us have one.

  • misty says:

    my daughter would melt with envy… our insurance will not cover a trampoline. The people behind us (you know, THAT family- 7 unruly kids with almost no supervision or bathing, all living in a 3 bedroom house) have a trampoline and poor Genny will just sit at her bedroom window and watch them rise and disappear across the fence…

  • Jane says:

    Out here in Utah, a 14 ft trampoline is practically miniature (and it’s the kind, with the safety netting, that Grampa bought for our girls).

    I can’t wait to get mine buried — then the ugly poles and netting can come down! Do they dig holes from trampolines back there, or is your water table too high?

  • How funny. My yard is exactly 14 feet wide. So even without a picture, I have a good mental image of your trampoline-to-come. In my mind, MY children are on it in MY yard, slamming into the wooden fence on each side with every bounce. I’m so glad your trampoline bouncing will not include splinters and concussions.

  • Gretchen says:

    We have a mediocre/not so incredibly safe 10′ trampoline that I had to PUT TOGETHER BY MYSELF (but don’t get me started on that), and it’s the first thing that every kid does when they walk into our backyard. It’s a huge hit. A kid magnet. Your family will be very popular.

  • Betsy says:

    Of course your dad sees the need for safety with a child’s toy. With his recent track record (especially with the sled) caution just makes sense.

  • OHmommy says:

    We have a super duper safe trampoline and the kids LOVE it. We send them outside right before bed time. It’s awesome.

    My daughter also broke her leg while jumping. Apparently – my pediatric ortho surgeon neighbor later told us – adults can never jump with a child. A double bounce can cause their bones to “bounce” together and one gives out and breaks. Which is the most common accident on trampolines. Not falling off.

    We still have it. Our rules are kids only, two at a time (never ever more). And we’ve had no problems.

    Enjoy it. We love ours.

  • Tara says:

    OOHHHH…..can’t wait to see the pictures of the kids (or Rick) jumping FROM THE TREE onto the trampoline!!!! Super fun times!!

  • so long as you don’t jump out of the tree onto the trampoline … which at 10 years old seemed like a really good idea … casts on broken arms are fun too.

  • red pen mama says:

    Like vowing to never own a minivan, I have vowed to never buy a trampoline for my kids. (I don’t know when/if I’ll eat those words; I suspect in the case of the former, soon.) My neighbors have one, and have let my kids jump on it, so that’s good enough for me.

    Have you ever heard of the trampoline center? It’s up in Cape Cod, and it’s BRILLIANT. They have 12 rectangular trampolines set into the ground (they’ve dug out underneath). You pay $5 for 10 minutes — it was my kids’ favorite place to go when we visited the cape last summer.

    If your yard is big enough, you could just do that, and charge all the neighborhood kids!

  • layla solms says:

    talk to your insurance agent. ask them their position on lurkers, tresspassers, vagabonds, etc.
    even if the injured child has insurance (as in your neighbor sends her kids to jump when you are not home) YOUR insurance will be forced by the injured party’s insurance to PAY. it might get ugly.

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kelcey kintner