We’ve been waiting for a few weeks now for our trampoline to be delivered to our new home.
My dad generously offered to buy us the SAFEST TRAMPOLINE ON THE PLANET. It’s one of those springless, double layered trampolines that hopefully means our family will avoid years of chiropractic work and lawsuits.
And as you can imagine, this kind of trampoline does not come cheap. I thought maybe my dad could just buy the $300 one from Walmart and we could use the rest of the money on higher education for my kids. But I knew my father would not go for this option since he had already outlined for my husband the best fire escape routes from our new home. My dad is serious about safety.
So the evening before our new super duper trampoline is supposed to be delivered and built in our yard, my dad just happens to mention in an email that it’s 14 feet in diameter. 14 feet? Only one word came to mind…
So I panicked.
I turned to my husband for some wise words. He proclaimed that 14 feet sounded big, safe and fun and then went back to his hockey game.
I dragged him outside at 8 pm and we attempted to measure our yard in the dwindling daylight to see if it would even fit in our desired location. It seemed to. Sort of. Except for that tree. But it was hard to see in the dark.
I emailed a friend for support who immediately proclaimed that she would be willing to bring over the elephants and clown car.
I canceled the delivery and the entire next day was dedicated to “trampoline size obsession,” a serious but not well known disorder. Since Rick has Mondays off (because he works on Saturdays), we went to look at trampolines. When I wasn’t worried about the right size, I obsessed over the bounce. Since no outdoor store will actually let a pregnant woman on a trampoline, I made Rick jump on different ones.
“Is it bouncy?”
“But maybe not enough bounce?”
“Definitely enough bounce.”
“How would you describe the bounce?”
“Do you feel like you have the right amount of room on the trampoline or too much room?”
“Exactly the right amount of room.”
“Doesn’t it look gigantic? It’s gigantic.”
“It looks gigantic and perfect.”
After much debate, we are sticking with the 14 foot trampoline. Mostly because we’re pretty almost sure it fits in the designated spot in our yard. It’s slightly safer than the 12 foot one. It’s available now. And the added bonus that I already have experience as a circus ringmaster.