I was looking at my daughters’ baby books last night. And I honestly couldn’t remember those babies.
Sure, I remember many tiny moments, like the fact that Dylan used to pinch and massage my neck when she nursed (which is why she’ll be chipping in for my future neck job). And how Summer would never take a bottle. Or a pacifier. Or succumb to sleep training. Or drink regular milk. She was and still is a very picky broad.
But I don’t really remember them as beings. What was it like to spend a whole day with Dylan or Summer – when they were 6 months? A year? Two years? I don’t really know anymore.
Which brings me to my 9 month-old twins. I am mad about them.
Chase has the softest, meatiest hands. And he has this gaze. He looks at me with his piercing blue eyes and it feels like pure love. His nearly bald head feels so soft, that rubbing it makes me feel calm and centered. He lives without fear, flinging himself off furniture and hunting down wires to chew. I need to harness some of that daring spirit (sans wires).
And Harlowe. She is still such a peanut at 14 pounds and has the cutest, softest little tush. It is effortless to hold her. She is always bursting with a smile and her fluffy hair continues to stick straight up. She feels no rush to crawl and takes pride at removing and eating her socks, her brother’s socks, her brother’s pacifier and whatever else she can find from her seated regal position. She has started crying when I leave the house, no matter how often I assure her that I will always come back.
I tell you all this because I don’t want to forget. I want to remember what it’s like to spend an entire day with Chase and Harlowe at 9 months. But I won’t. Because they will grow, change and I will then know new, beautiful perfect beings. The babies will fade. The memories will disappear. It’s unstoppable.
And yes, I love sharing with you the humor of life. The fact that my husband, after 10 years together, truly believed I might like a red velour hoodie-footie. That he does indeed wear safety dance pants when he trains for his competition. And that I mistakenly thought my twins had some kind of magical connection.
So I will, of course, continue to share my humor every week. Trying to find the funny in life is always my passion. And my joy.
But today, I just wanted you to know how much Harlowe likes to eat her socks.
And her fluffy hair.
And about Chase’s soft hands.
And the way he rests his head on my shoulder when he’s tired. In the sweetest, most amazing way.
So maybe I won’t forget.
mama bird notes:
If you missed my Babble NY column this week and are looking for some great winter break activities, you can check out The Touch Tunnel at the Liberty Science Center, “Pinkalicious the Musical” and the new book in the series, “Silverlicious”, Houdini magic at the Jewish Museum and a new family musical, “Sky Boys” about the building of the Empire State Building. As for me, I am headed to Memphis to meet my new nephew.