There is something about growing older that can make one feel more fearful. Instead of a youthful exuberance to bungee jump across Europe, you suddenly find yourself sitting down with a guy named Hank to compare life insurance plans – just in case you really do get hit by a bus when you go out to get your mail.
Maybe it’s that you have more to lose than you did when you were 20. Or maybe because you were a size 4 with tight abs and no neck wrinkles so you thought you were untouchable. Maybe the world seemed so wide open with possibilities that you wouldn’t have even considered limiting your options in any way.
I’ll admit – even when I was young I wasn’t the “jump out of an airplane” kind of girl. But I was certainly more daring.
I didn’t worry much about anyone but myself. Now I worry constantly about these little people that are all over my house. Am I giving them a good life? Am I raising them to be kind, compassionate people? Am I to blame that one of them is standing on top of the roof of the minivan having a sword fight? Stuff like that.
Somehow as we age, we start shutting ourselves off to possibilities. We think – hey, maybe I can control my fate if I’m just a bit more careful. But I’ve actually heard that we can’t actually control the world which is sort of lame but certainly noteworthy. So I thought to myself – maybe it’s time to do a bit more leaping.
Which is how I found myself at the top of a trapeze last weekend. I did the trapeze about 10 years ago in New Paltz, New York and I did not particularly like it.
So why was I back a decade later?! Because I have a 7 and 10 year old daughter and they wanted me to do it while we were on vacation at Club Med. And if I couldn’t be brave for myself, I could at least be courageous for them.
Plus, when we live our lives being too afraid, we start losing ourselves. Oh and my mother-in-law got up there and swung from the trapeze so I didn’t want her to think her son was married to some kind of pathetic wimp.
So I did it…
Okay, it’s not a high flying Cirque du Soleil trapeze performance but it was scary to climb up the ladder and jump off from that plank of death up there.
And I showed my girls that in life you push through fear and go for it. Because taking the leap is what life is all about.
An no, you won’t find me jumping out of an airplane.
Or bungee jumping across Europe.
But sword fighting on top of my minivan is definitely a possibility.