I like to envision myself as really mysterious and unpredictable and under the radar but apparently I’m pretty easy to figure out because a ton of you guessed that we bought the Toyota Highlander Hybrid.
Kirsten got it first so she gets to name our car. I am hoping she comes up with something fun, sporty and cool like, “The Answer to our Marital Problems because of its Individual Passenger Temperature Controls.” It’s a bit long and formal but I like it. And we can always nickname it “car.”
Rick and I have major temperature issues. He’s always really hot. And I’m normal. Or as Rick describes normal… “She’s always freakishly cold.”
Now Rick is a problem solver which means he’s figured out a way for me to solve the problem. He maintains that I can always put on additional layers but he can only take off so many clothes. But I’ve never seen him lying around buck naked in a tub of ice watching a Phillies’ game so I don’t think he’s making the full effort.
But here’s the brilliance of our Toyota Hybrid – we each get to choose our own temperature! Now I’m sure a million other kinds of cars do this as well, but I’ve been living a very sheltered life in my 1999 Jeep Cherokee. In my Cherokee, if you want to be warmer, you just gas up 14 times and drive to Boca Raton.
Now if only we had this genius Toyota technology in our house. And yes, we are absolutely considering sleeping in our car as a way to achieve marital harmony.
I’ll tell you one couple that can’t be fairing so well these days. Bernie and Ruth Madoff.
Bernie Madoff is that delightful chap who defrauded thousands of investors of billions of dollars with his Ponzi scheme and is now serving 150 years in prison.
You know Ruth gave Bernie the ole, “Honey, you know I love you. And I’m sure the 150 years will FLY by but until then, I’m signing up for eHarmony. And I’ll be shtupping our former gardener, if he hasn’t already been repossessed.”
But heck at least Bernie has a place to call home. Sad Ruth has nowhere to live because no building in Manhattan wants her. And on top of that, she’s apparently practically broke. I keep reading about how she was, “left with just 2.5 million after a cutting a deal with the feds to surrender all her other assets.”
JUST 2.5 million. How will she ever get by?!!
Clearly, the press needs to stop obsessing over Michael Jackson and start focusing on the plight of this poor woman.
I think maybe we should take up a collection or something. At least to get her started with an online dating service. I’d advise her to avoid those finance types.
mama bird notes: