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rock of love: it’s not love, it’s an obsession
I can still remember the moment I fell hard for VH1′s reality rocker dating show, “Rock of Love,” starring Poison frontman Bret Michaels. I somehow missed season 1 and 2, pretty much the same way I failed to embrace skinny jeans for the first couple years they were around.
But then one fateful evening, I caught an episode of season 3. One of the contestants, a very wasted Kelsey (us sharing the same name is just a flattering coincidence) yelled out, “I can’t be the first girl to ever get drunk and lay on a speed bump.”
Apparently, Bret couldn’t handle a chick who spooned with speed bumps while intoxicated so Kelsey’s tour ended right there.
But this Kelcey stayed on for the rest of the ride.
In last night’s finale, Moody Mindy lost out to the Penthouse Pet Taya. I was personally rooting for Mindy. Mindy proved to be a terrible singer in one of the challenges and given that my 4 year-old can carry a tune better than I can, I felt a special kinship. Or maybe I was just somehow brainwashed by her deep Southern drawl.
“Rock of Love” is a trifecta addiction:
1. Fascination with the number of ways cleavage can be displayed.
2. Amazement by how many open mouth kisses Bret can deliver in one episode.
3. Deep pondering over what’s under Bret’s bandana.
Does the guy have hair underneath there?
Can anyone find a photo of him (without a bandana or cowboy hat) in the last 5 years? Link to it and maybe I’ll call you up and sing “Every Rose Has Its Thorn.” You just won’t find this offer on other blogs.
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Really? You’ll sing? That’s quite an offer.
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changing phone number…
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Seriously, you don’t want to know what’s under Bret’s bandana. Just like you don’t want to know what’s under Alan Jackson or Dwight Yoakam’s cowboy hats!
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You’re the only other person (besides my husband and me) who has openly admitted to watching that show. Between Friday Night Lights, Gosssip Girl… and now this… you have awesome taste. Either that or we’re all cheese balls.
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i believe the only reason i have NOT been watching is b/c we switch from comcast to verizon and i don’t know the vh1 channel number by heart. otherwise i would be there. however i did fall VERY HARD tonight for yet another road rules / real world challenge. hubby told me i needed some serious help b/c i couldn’t even nod to him. i was transfixed.
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Oh, hon. It’s too bad we live on opposite coasts because we have the exact same taste in terrible reality shows and teeny bopper soap operas (totally with you on the Nate-Blair thing.).
Did you see Donna is coming back to 90210? I have a whole blog post in my head about it, I am so excited.
Season 1 of Rock of Love is the best of the 3. Really.
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I’m scared of what’s under Brett’s bandana. I have to watch that show when my husband is out of town. He can’t stand it. I don’t understand why he isn’t distracted by all the cleavage.
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Ha! Season 1 sucked me in and it was all over from there… Although, I did miss most of Season 3 last night between baby feedings I caught the last episode where he choose the Penthouse playmate (um, yeah, that’s gonna last).
P.S. Just like Kirsten – I’m terrified of what one would find under Bret’s bandanna. A ninja perhaps or a flying monkey – it’s a toss up.
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My sources tell me he’s balding and wears what is obviously a shitty weave. Seriously. You, my friend Jen in LA, and my trainer need to hang out. The three of you keep begging me to watch this show, but it is really more important to me to make sure I am up to date with the Kardashians and figure out a way to kill Speidi.
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It’s on you and a few other blogging friends that I spent two hours last night watching the final two episodes. And now I’m hooked. Except a little too late.
I was rooting for Mandy, too.
Seriously, I would not want to kiss him. Ever.
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http://trashwire.com/blog/wp-c.....t4408a.jpg
no need to call and sing:)
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Oh, my gosh. LOVE IT. It’s like a train wreck…you really, really want to avert your eyes from all the cleavage, trashy two-toned hair, and lingerie worn as clothing, but it’s so impossibly fascinating that you HAVE to watch. And it makes me feel good about myself, because I know that no matter how low I feel I’ve sunk in life, at least I’m not half naked and throwing myself at a washed-up rockstar who wears extensions on national TV.
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Under that bandana is another head with a bandana. And inside that head is another head. It’s like those Russian Doll things, it just goes on and on.
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Too funny we only get BBC and MTV here in Germany (english channels that is ) and they play VH1 shows. We get sucked in to Rock of Love everytime, they are a bit behind we are viewing season 2 . I love it where do they find these women!
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Mmmmm mmmm He can get it! It’s proven….he’s EXCELLENT in bed. But the headband might just stop me….he needs to embrace his baldness…and he is clearly not, by hanging onto his hair for dear life. Bret honey….you’re foolin’ no one.
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Okay, I’ll admit it…. I watch, too. I can’t help it. I’m nauseous and fascinated at the same time.
Those girls! Where are their mothers!?
Are they for real?!
God help us when they’re in their 40s, can you imagine?
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The ONE reality show I don’t watch and you say it’s fantastic?! I don’t think my tivo can handle any more…
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I love the trifecta list…that made me laugh, which is a lovely little gift first thing in the morning.
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Oh, Taya. You Penthouse Pet with the heart of gold. Please break Bret’s heart ASAP so we can have a ROL season #4.
And I’m guessing that what’s under his bandana is a huge topical dose of penicillin.
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That show is a complete trainwreck! I can’t believe I missed the finally:(
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I’m on it. I missed my song this year
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i’ve always been curious about the show, but never got around to watching it–I’ll have to next season
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I have no idea who he is. Ignorance is bliss no?
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High five to watching really really bad TV and loving it..I was rooting for Mindy and her accent.. because this LI girl loves a great accent.
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I watch it every once in a while, but I’m not hooked. I’m fascinated by the fact he’s a type 1 diabetic. I wish we would see more of what he has to do to keep his blood sugar in range, and how they handle it when he drinks too much.
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Thanks for the link, Becky! I can’t believe he actually looks WORSE without the bandana! My husband watches this show–I peek every now and then, but reality TV irritates me ever since I realized it’s not “real”.
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My husband and I have not missed a single episode, ever….matter of fact we watch all of the “of love” shows obsessively and are not one bit embarrassed to say that we are anxiously awaiting the season premier of “Daisy of Love” next week. Wow, I feel like I should delete this post….
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Oh Caren, you are not the only one excited about “Daisy of Love!” I love the nut jobs! It was sad when Frank the Entertainer got voted off of “I Love Money 2!” And I can’t get enough of “Tough Love’! Stasha, we hardly knew ye…
WHOA!!!! I watch WAY too much VH1!!!
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That bandana’s hiding something. He’s either got topical rogaine up there or some nasty doll-head.
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How old was that non-bandana pic? I think they may have broken the rules. You said last five years.
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Umm, yeah. I have wondered the same thing. I’m picturing a huge bald spot surrounded by a terrible weave.
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I dunno but he’s wearin’ eyeliner and that scares me.
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So funny and gross – you can lose hours watching it! So he can’t find love…if he does he no longer has a paycheck and they won’t want him! Unbelievable that we are all watching!!
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I will sing it with you – I do personally think he is still pretty hot but I doubt it would last if he took the do rag off! How do you spell that do anyway? I watched the show a bit – not reg. though. SHould have! Not a lot of TV watching time here and I waste it on things like the new 90210.
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I have resisted that show. I honestly don’t know if I could look myself in the eye in the mirror if I watched Rock of Love AND Toddlers in Tiaras…
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Under the bandana is a swastika. He was one of Manson’s followers when he was a younger dirty hippie.
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Seriously? You really want to see that hairline? I’d make fun o fyou, but I watched season 2.
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I’m dying to see the hairline!! And the speed bump quote would have stopped me in my tracks, too. I haven’t seen the show, though!
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first season, call me guilty. Bringing it back again and again, I can’t do it.
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I have never seen the show – and have to admit I have not heard of it. . .Did you find the photo without a bandana or cowboy hat? Great post!
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because I tried to follow Becky’s link and it has since been removed I had to find one for myself.
http://showclix.com/blog/wp-co.....2bret. jpg
I actually don’t think it THAT bad.
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I found another one!
http://farm4.static.flickr.com.....33f58b.jpg
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Does anyone know where Bret was in 1980. We are in PA and my sister said she met a guy with his name and description who used to call her and play his guitar for her. Said he wanted to start a band.
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