I’m a little sad Halloween is over. There is something incredibly freeing, glorious and guilt free about this holiday. It’s the day when anything organic is cast aside, high fructose corn syrup rules and candy is calorie free (or at least that’s what I heard. Or made up. Whatever).
There are no bedtime routines or soapy baths. Just power ranger outfits, Cleopatra gowns and an explosion of Elsa’s.
At one point, I heard a gigantic Gumby say, “I just accidentally scared the crap out of Elsa.”
And yes, it was my Elsa. But she didn’t seem too shaken up. Evidently, it takes a lot more than a big green, whatever the hell he is to spook 4 year old Harlowe.
It’s her twin Chase who hates anything scary so obviously this is not his dream holiday. He was terrified of every scary outfit and especially those adults who like to dress like the grim reaper and hold the candy bowl very very still until some unsuspecting power ranger comes along and just as he takes a Kit Kat out of the bowl – BAM. The grim reaper suddenly moves and my poor 4 year old jumps about 3 miles in the air, runs back to me and sobs and sobs.
Man, it’s not easy to get a free mini candy bar these days.
When Chase wasn’t crying, 7 year old Summer (dressed as Katy Perry/diva girl) was screeching and freaking about every dog (from the biggest canine to the teacup poodle) who came her way.
Of course every dog owner, when they notice Summer’s upset, says the same thing… “She’s a sweet dog. She won’t hurt anyone.” And I believe them, despite the fact I once said the same thing to a man who was pretty much being tackled on a beach by our former dog Martini.
Now I don’t know the dog population numbers for South Florida but I’m going to estimate that every single person has a dog. So Summer was on a real emotional roller coaster all night long. Dog! (miserable) Candy! (happy) Dog! (miserable) Candy! (happy).
Meanwhile… from what I could tell, every teenager in our neighborhood was dressed as a bloody vampire. Although props to the one kid who bucked peer pressure and went as a banana. (Especially because it’s really hard to pass someone in a banana outfit and not share your best banana joke. You’re thinking of a banana joke right now, aren’t you?)
Rick missed out on the whole thing because he was working but the next morning we took a rollerblade/walk and you would be amazed at how much unopened, perfectly good candy you can find on the ground the day after Halloween.
And if you think we are too fancy to pick up candy from the ground, well then you underestimate our love of candy around here.
So now it’s back to baths, bedtime routines and homework. Damn.