I recently got this email…
“I came across your Mama Bird Diaries website and I thought it could be the perfect place to find fabulous new moms. We are looking to cast pregnant, first time moms that live an elite lifestyle in NYC for the second season of ‘Pregnant in Heels’…. Do you know any readers that fit this criteria?”
And I immediately thought, “Wait – they aren’t asking me to be on the show?!”
I own heels! I could buy more!
I mean, sure there are a few other little kinks to work out. Like I guess I would have to get pregnant. And although I haven’t officially run it by him, I’m sure Rick would totally be on board. At least once he knows how important this show is to me. Plus, I think if you buy four college educations, the fifth one is free.
And maybe it’s not our FIRST pregnancy. But I could hide those four little rugrats during the filming. As it is, I usually forget they are even in the house due to them being so silent and unneedy all the time.
The show also wants me to be living an elite New York City lifestyle. I don’t really live in NYC anymore but I think I make up for it by being super elite. Like I always drink champagne. Usually Andre.
And sometimes when I’m folding laundry, I wear a long white dress and pretend I’m Pippa Middleton and that I’m screening calls from Prince Harry because I find his need for attention just exhausting. I also try to look down on people who don’t watch “Gossip Girl” because I’m just elite like that.
So as you can see, I’m pretty much guaranteed a spot in the cast. And if that doesn’t work out, there’s always the new show, “The Virgin Diaries.”
Have you seen this promo? Oh my god. I really hope your first kiss wasn’t like this…
I’m sorry you had to see that. Really, I am.