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There are people who send their kids to very ritzy expensive summer camps.

I am not one of those people.

Because I like cute clothes and highlights.

How can I afford trendy clothes and shiny, perfectly highlighted hair if I blow all my money on fancy summer enrichment programs?

So I’m sending my daughter Dylan to our local town camp.  It is the best bargain ever. She did mention something last year about seeing “Seinfeld” on a rainy day but then said she might be confused. It could have been a scary dinosaur movie. So she either learned about Jerry and Elaine or prehistoric animals.  The point is… she wasn’t at home taping stuffed animals to my dining room table. Like she did today.

In order to register for camp, you have to make sure you have the right forms.  So the morning before registration, I make sure we have everything.

Application. Got it.

Proof of Residence. Got it.

Immunization records. Oh sweet campy cheesus. We don’t have it.

Didn’t they give me a copy of her health forms at her last check-up? Wouldn’t I have obviously filed them in the “Dylan” folder? Or did I inadvertently file them in the recycle bin?

I call the doctor’s office. I can pick up a copy in the next half hour. I ask my mother to stay and help with the kids or at least I think that’s what I said as I ran out the door, hyperventilating and mumbling something about camp.  I race to the pediatrician’s office. I get the forms. Tear home.  Then I call the camp to make sure I don’t need anything else I may have mistakenly stored in our garbage can.

“Oh you don’t need your immunization records. Dylan was here last summer. Her immunizations are already on your application form,” they explain.

Okay. Good to know. Perhaps a little earlier.

Anyway, this camp is a steal so you have to line up about two hours ahead of time to get your kid a spot.

Yes, people bring chairs.

I make Rick come home early from work to wait in line. My words as I rush him out the door… “Don’t let any of those mothers push you around. It can get rowdy out there.”

I quickly get a text upon his arrival, “First dad in line. 8th overall. Kick it.”

Oh yes, we got a spot.

25 Responses to my kids must go to summer camp

  • erinb says:

    we are soooooooo all about camp this summer too-all those snow days with my 3yr old home from preschool taught me that we can in no way in hell be home together 7 days a week!!

  • Aimee says:

    It is insane now a days being a parent! So much pressure to make sure we get this signed, call this, and be the first in line or logged in to sign our kids up. However, I am with you–when it calls for a bargain I am willing to put in a little blood sweat and tears. Now you can go by yourself a new dress or a pair of fancy shoes 🙂

  • steph says:

    So I recommended to them that next year they bring out the roving martini bar that they have stashed away in the basement. If you look carefully, I am standing in back of the woman with the long black coat carrying the white bag! Yeah, I finally made it to the blog. I am going to call my agent this morning!

  • Alex says:

    Oh goddess of summer camps, please find me a summer camp in Park Slope! The fun-and-affordable concept has not hit our hood yet. Maybe Noa would enjoy hanging out at Chuck E Cheese every day…I’ll line her pockets with singles, give her my cell phone and return 6:00 to pick her up.

  • annie says:

    You 2 are like the coolest parents evah! I’ve never said kick it and I’m sure my husband hasn’t either. I think I’m old. So very very old.

  • Heidi says:

    Awesome! I signed Molly up for every available date of summer camp at her preschool. The kid’s not even two, but she was home sick with the flu last week – zero papers were graded, I didn’t get to run, and the dishes didn’t even make it to the dishwasher. We were getting in summer camp if it was the last thing I did last week! Please tell me it’s not awful to send my 22 month old to six weeks of summer camp!?

  • Lisa says:

    I have learned everything about parenting from your blog…I am off to buy a folding/travel chair so I am ready for any future sign-ups.

  • Aunt Marcia (Guess Whose?) says:

    Girl Scout Camp is a good ‘deal’ also. If you want her to be eating bright pink frankfurters, washing her own clothing and hanging them on a line to dry outside..and when your wash falls into the mud…they make you wear it like that (no second washing allowed)…and going on ridiciously long hikes too hard for small feet (where you pray to be stung by a hornet so you can stop hiking and see the nurse). Yes, that was my 2 weeks at camp…a ONE TIME ONLY EVENT.

  • GrandeMocha says:

    I got a deal on Groupon for one week of camp. Yea!!!

    I’ve been in line with ice skating moms & they are viscious. They try and blend into line with their friends so they can get the best time & the best teacher. I had to call them out.

  • Tonya says:

    Our local Y is like that. I bring spiked coffee and offer it to all the other parents in line then while they’re out cold I get my kid the top spot. Works. Every. Time. You’d think they’d catch on but I believe they secretly like it…it’s probably the best couple hours sleep they’ve had in forever.

  • I actually might give my kids tape and stuffed animals now. They need some hobbies.

    I love that he was in it to win it. Greg would tell me he’d sooner wait in line for Celine Dion tickets than summer camp.

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kelcey kintner