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About a month ago, my friend Abby said to me,

“Hey, do you want to go to the Britney Spears concert with me? The show is 5 days after I’m having foot surgery but you could always push me in a wheelchair though Madison Square Garden.”

At which point a normal person would have said,

“Well, I don’t think that sounds like a great idea. I mean, shouldn’t you be resting your foot instead of us inadvertently crashing your wheelchair into throngs of Britney loving tweens?”

But instead I said,

“Sure. Let’s buy tickets.”

So I picked her up before the concert and thankfully she was able to manage on crutches.

In fact, they were really useful for waving down cabs.

abby hails a cab

And getting the bartender’s attention in crowded bars.

abby orders a drink

So we arrive at the concert and let me just say that Britney’s body looks awesome. I made a mental note to have children in my twenties instead of my thirties, but I might be late on that brilliant idea.

And she sings really well, if your definition ofΒ  singing is lip synching.Β  And I kept hoping her ex Justin would come out and do a duet. It’s not good to have those kind of high expectations at a Britney Spears concert.

My friend Abby was clearly in the Britney know and would say things like, “With all her money, you’d think she’d get better hair extensions.” And I would think to myself, “She’s wearing hair extensions?!” I kept my mouth shut though because I didn’t want to seem like some bonehead on Britney trivia.

Of course, I ran into my babysitter (who is 20 years younger than me) which means my sitter must have a very mature taste in music if we’re at the same concert.Β  And thankfully she wasn’t supposed to be watching my kids that night.

Since Abby was on crutches, we got to take the elevator like VIPs. Although it seemed more like the employee elevator so I’m not sure how important we actually were.

And I thought it would be a riot if we bought Britney shirts and took a picture wearing them but once I saw that they cost 40 bucks each, it seemed a lot less funny. So here’s a shot of us not wearing Britney shirts.

abby and kelcey at britney spears

By the way, in breaking Britney news… It turns out that some of her fans got in trouble with security because they were dancing too provocatively during one of her NYC concerts. First of all, that seems a bit ridiculous since Britney was on stage, wearing sort of nothing and gyrating all over the place. And second, just to clarify, it was not Abby and me.

mama bird notes:

Contributing mama Daphne Biener was just getting used to her role as the summertime mama but that laid back lady has been MIA since the first day of school. Click on contributing mamas to read more.

33 Responses to it’s britney, bitch

  • Amy says:

    Not to self, bring disabled friend to pre-bar and concert next time. Glad to hear Brit is looking good and hopefully back on track. Not a huge fan but would probably go with disabled fun friend πŸ™‚ Sounds like you two had a good time.

  • Shana says:

    You know? It would never even cross my mind to go to a Britney concert. You are so cool. Now Mr. JT is another matter. Sadly, the next concert on my agenda is Miley Cyrus. Seriously.

  • scrappysue says:

    sounds a bit like the madonna concert i went to – more for the experience of being at MSG than anything else! i don’t think madonna has hair extensions tho…

  • Halala Mama says:

    I heard about the arrests on the radio this morning and I knew it wasn’t you and Abby because even out here in Indianapolis, they didn’t mention crutches. πŸ˜‰ And yes, they too mentioned that it seemed ironic people in the crowd were arrested given what she was doing on stage (the dancing, not the lip syncing, which *I* think is a crime at a concert. Sing already dammit.)

  • Inna says:

    How in the world did my dancing make the news that fast??? Geez!

    j/k I wasn’t actually at the concert, I was just dancing to her album at home…

  • I doubt I am the only one who is curious to the thought process of two 30 something somethings to go to a Britney concert. It is most curious to me and am requesting a blog entry that addresses this mystery or perhaps an email.

  • Daphne says:

    I am disappointed that the 2 of you didn’t represent better. If you’re going to be the only ah-hem mature ladies at the concert, then it should have been you shaking it all the way to the jailhouse. Next time try harder!

  • MommyTime says:

    Ok, I started then deleted an absurdly long and not that interesting comment which basically boils down to: I hear you on the babies in one’s twenties thing! I missed that boat too, and my abs are currently paying for it.

    Though Britney wouldn’t have been my choice, I’m impressed that you went to any concert at all.

  • Crystal says:

    WOW! I think I’m jealous! The last concert I went to hubs took me to see John Cougar Mellencamp…without the Cougar part. We were told we couldn’t take pictures, tho!

    Glad to hear it WASN’T you that was arrested…think how embarassing THAT would be!

  • Abby Siegel says:

    I don’t recall reading that we were the OLDEST or most MATURE women at that concert. I will tell you that one of my 17 year old students went with his mom and dad on Monday night, so they are definitely older than we are. We also texted him to for the exact time when Brit would show up on stage so we could stay at the bar and use my crutches for attention. And we both were secretly hoping for a Brit/JT reunion. He showed up when I saw the Black Eyed Peas, why not Brit Brit? Anyway, it was a blast!

  • ErinB says:

    “All eyes on me in the center of the ring just like a circus…”
    soooo jealous….!!!!! Abby is a super star on those crutches.

  • Laurel says:

    I just found your blog and you are hilarious. I am a 28 year old mom of 2 living in Tribeca. Kinda wish I had found you before you left the city, but tales of life in Weschester will do πŸ™‚

  • Laurel says:

    I do know how to spell Westchester…just trying to make dinner, break up a fight over a bouncy ball, and read blogs at the same time.

  • Ann says:

    Still digesting the “crown in a box,” but at least I know why the Rockettes are following me on Twitter.

    You really do make the world go ’round, don’t you.

    Oh, and you are adorable. Will you be my friend?

    It always made me so uncomfortable when people asked me that directly as a child. Now I must go write a blog post on it.

  • Aunt Marcia (Guess Whose?) says:

    I can’t imagine what anyone has to do in NYC to get arrested now; short of shooting people. Would a pole dance with one of the crutches caused you to be hauled away in handcuffs? I’m sorry NYC has gotten so uptight now…We can still parade around S.F. naked during most events…Police look the other way.

  • Madmad says:

    You are a total trouper. I don’t know that I have anyone I love enough to take to a Britney concert! But darn, it does make a good blog post! Too funny!

  • calikim says:

    Did you see Diddy??? He was there too…even though JT didn’t show up for you.

    And I might be a little disturbed your friend has the cell number of a 17 year old male student…..and texts him. HA!!!

  • Abby Siegel says:

    So I just confessed 5.5 weeks later to my parents that we did this and they laughed hysterically at the blog and photos. Thankfully my foot healed really well so in the end not a big deal!

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kelcey kintner