2-year-old Harlowe peed in the potty.
I’m very disappointed in that girl.
I’m not interested in potty training my 2-year-olds. I like them just the way they are, with their tushes all wrapped in absorbent chemical somethings — what the hell are those diapers made of anyway?
No matter. Why does everyone say with such gusto and a fist pump, “We are done with diapers!”
They should just say… “A one hour drive will now take us 6 hours with bathroom breaks!”
There’s a reason that crazy NASA astronaut drove 950 miles in diapers so she could confront a romantic rival. A course in “Peeing in Bathrooms is a Serious Time Waster” must be part of the rigorous NASA training.
And the transition out of diapers can be tortuous. I’m not one of those parents who enjoys a potty party where you sit inside all day, aggressively hydrating your child and putting them on the potty every 10 minutes. My idea of a party includes a babysitter, margaritas and if at all possible, a rooftop bar.
Of course, if Harlowe is all insistent on this potty thing, I’ll break out my portable potty.
Look at sweet 3 1/2 year-old Dylan on the streets of New York City…
That’s convenience right there my friend.
And, of course, I’ve been to known to use the portable potty myself in desperate situations.
But for now, I will continue to waste my money on mountains of unearth friendly diapers.
P.S. I do a lot of recycling and I’m desperately hoping this is offsetting my carbon footprint.
P.P.S. I’m serious about that don’t yell at me thing.
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