I made it back to Florida! Just 21 hours of driving – spread over 3 days – with 5 kids in the back.
I got to watch my 10 year old steal every conditioner, lotion, coffee filter, tea bag and anything else that wasn’t nailed down in the hotel room. I’m guessing she’s planning to open up some kind of beauty coffee house in the next few months.
My father (who thankfully came along for the ride) entertained me by reading headlines from USA Today.
I sounded super grateful by saying things like, “That’s interesting dad but I read that on the CNN website 24 hours ago.” This did not deter him. The man loves his USA Today.
We tried to make the trip bearable by stopping in cute places like Charlottesville, VA and Charleston, SC.
In Charlottesville, it was wonderful to see my friend Valerie from Tulane. But my children behaved so badly at a restaurant that the waitress came over and said, “Can I get anyone a cocktail?” It wasn’t 5 pm anywhere but she could tell the adults were in need of something.
The next day, as I pulled into Charleston, I said to the kids…
“Look at this beautiful southern town.”
“I see a highway and a carwash,” said one of them.
“Look out your windows. It’s so cute,” I exclaimed.
“I see a palm tree. It looks like Miami,” said another.
“Charleston is mommy’s old stomping grounds. I used to come here and visit my friend Jordana. We were young and free and crazy and ….”
“I’m bored,” said another.
“That’s what’s wrong with your generation. You can’t just sit in a car and enjoy the view,” I said (wondering if I had ever sat and enjoyed the view when I was a kid).
“Hey, I see a garbage can!” said another.
“Look at that church. It’s beautiful,” I said.
“I hate beets,” came another voice from the back.
When we finally got back to Florida – I asked my kids what they thought of the trip. “It was fantastic! We got to stay in hotels and watch TV in the car and eat at McDonald’s everyday!”
Well, at least they liked it.