I think being tired is sort of like being drunk because I’m definitely having trouble processing information. And it’s not like I’m sitting down to work out a calculus equation. I’m trying to do simple things like locate my house keys and order a smoothie.
For instance, I went to the gas station a few days ago. I opted for a full serve station because it was the closest station and I knew it was almost time to feed the twins.
So I pull up at the gas station and give the guy my credit card and zip code.
I give the wrong zip code.
He tells me to try again.
I give the wrong one again.
Because it’s similar to my own, I keep giving my dad’s Cape Cod zip code. I try reminding myself that I have a Masters degree from an Ivy League institution to try to jump start my brain. This strategy does not work. Finally, unable to think of my own zip code, I give the gas attendant the name of my town and he inputs the correct one.
Then comes challenge #2. He tells me to unlatch the gas tank. And I can’t find the lever inside the car. Where is it? I know it’s in here somewhere. He has to show it to me. At this point, I’m pretty sure this guy thinks I stole the credit card and the car.
Thankfully, he doesn’t seem to care.
Since I don’t want anyone reporting me to the police for auto theft, I finally followed all your advice and had a doula come help me overnight. It was ultra fabulous. She only woke me up to breastfeed and took care of all the diaper changing, soothing and swaddling.
As Rick pointed out, sleeping in the same room as twins is like trying to sleep in a petting zoo with all the grunts and groans and squawking. Except you don’t have to buy any of those overpriced pellets to feed them. So it was really nice to have a night of quiet.
I’m going to treat myself to this luxury once or twice a week just so I can get a break and be alert enough to relearn my zip code. The morning after the doula left, I emailed her to express my gratitude (although I think she wants a check too). In the email, I wrote, “Thanks so much for last night. It was amazing.”
I know. It sounds like I hired a hooker.