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halloween is harder than it looks
Halloween decorations in the city: Stick a piece of black duct tape (provided by your super) to your apartment door so trick or treaters know to ring your doorbell.
Halloween decorations in the suburbs: Take out a small loan, drive to Party City, scoop up absolutely everything in the Halloween aisle and dump it on your front lawn.
The Halloween decorations are something fierce out here. Skeletons coming out of the ground, ghosts swinging from the trees and devils emerging from the rooftops.
I realize that it’s time to get my game on. So I head down to Party City and buy three paper lanterns that light up. Ok, I guess I’m semi getting my game on.
I hang them in my windowsill and they look very Halloweeny in an understated way. Until one of them falls. And then the bulbs burn out about 2 hours later.
So I replace the bulbs and the batteries, rehang the rogue lantern and relaunch my Halloween display.
And the bulbs burn out again. And now I’m out of bulbs. And batteries.
Hmm… this is more effort than I anticipated.
I return the dumb lanterns and this time put my Halloween reputation in the hands of ghosts that plug in.
But we still have the lamest house on the block when it comes to decorating, so Rick decides to buy some orange lights for our font steps.
Except they turn out to be pink.
I know because I can actually see them and because Dylan says, “I like the new lights. I love pink.”
But it’s confusing because these lights did come in a big orange box from Target with the label, “Halloween Lights” and not with the more appropriate label of “Valentine’s Day Lights.”
But just to absolutely confirm that we are now the only family on the block with pink Halloween lights, I ask one more source… a guy soliciting for money for the ASPCA. He comes to my door and he’s actually very cute but I don’t give him any money because I just want to sit down and watch “Cougar Town.” I know, my priorities are not impressive.
As he’s leaving, I say, “So can I ask you something? What color are these lights?”
“Pink. With a tinge of orange.”
Alright. I can live with a tinge of orange. Happy Halloween.
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I got stuck with a ton of gooey crap on my windows and spider web stuff on my rose bushes. Good luck to me getting that crap off
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We lucked out they don’t celebrate Halloween here. But I still but a pumpkin on front porch.
And left the real spider webs outside my door and window. Weird not having Halloween except I always eat the candy so yeah calories saved!!
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spider webs are always good on the bushes and also, wrapped around the railings…we have scary eyeballs in the bushes outside that blink…for the suburbs we’re pretty lame and we’ve been here over 5 years so no excuse!
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We are totally lame while all our neighbors go all out. Finally, last night, while everyone was trick or treating, my husband printed out two clip art pumpkins and taped them to our front porch. How’s that for fancy decor?
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Hahaha – awesome effort Kelcey! Everyone knows you’re new here -no one expects much
I think pinkish-orangish lights are actually exceed expectations. Great effort.
(if it makes you feel better, we carved 4 pumpkins together, and put them out, 5 minutes later a squirrel had eaten through TUCKER’s pumpkin eye….. of course he had to pick Tuck’s poor pumpkin. We’ll get it right next year, mama!!!!!
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At least you’ve got your decorations for Valentine’s Day in suburbia.
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I got the the pink lights too! So funny! Did you get them at Target? They DID say ORANGE. The box is ORANGE. Somehow the neighbors have ORANGE. I wonder where they got theirs?
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2 days off for snow, and back to school just in time for Halloween parties, and Halloween parades, and trick or treating….
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PS–Awesome new look! I love it.
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Another sign you’re in the suburbs. People come knocking at your door for money. In the city, they just wait for you on the off ramps of highways. =)
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I too LOVE Cougar Town! I find it’s best enjoyed with the bowl of Halloween candy that I know will be gone before any actual Trick-or-Treater rings my doorbell. Guess I’ll just have to turn off the light and pretend I’m not home – again this year.
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You’ve done way more than we have. We bought three pumpkins. They are as yet uncarved.
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Kelcey-you’ve got to get yourself to Christmas Tree Shop on Central Avenue in Hartsdale! That’s the best place for anything Halloween, or any other given holiday! And super inexpensive! Check it out!
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After last years wash out (and having to eat all of the leftover candy) I am turning my lights out this year.
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yep, we’re the lamest house on our block with the decorations. i put a few pumpkins and squash-like gourds by the door, bought a couple of Smith & Hawken for Target lanterns, a Papyrus paper pumpkins on a string in the window and called it a day!
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You’re a good mom. I bought three pumpkins [one for each boy] that still haven’t been carved. They get to trick-or-treat!
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I have a box of Halloween/fall decorations in the basement. However the 3 foot snow drifts in the front yard have spoiled my enthusiasm for this holiday. Trick-or-treating in the snow, with a 4 year old, I am not thinking that this will be fun.
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How can you be expected to decorate when you’re in a sugar coma from pre-eating the Halloween candy? That’s my question.
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I’m watching Cougar Town too, I guess in preparation for my big bday next year. But poor ASPCA guy – gets no money and has to provide decorating assistance!!!
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But the ghosts are cute. Really cute!
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No worries… we don’t decorate much either. We have a few pumpkins and we will carve them tonight. Enjoy the day!
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Just tell your neighbors that’s how real New Yorkers decorate for Halloween.
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You’re doing better than we are. Our decorations consist of three uncarved pumpkins and one construction paper spider.
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my neighborhood is strictly mums and carved pumpkins…thank god..or I would be outta here. I cant deal with that kinda stress.
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Just have Rick answer the door NAKED when the Trick or Treaters come around, and you won’t have to do anything for next year. Your house will be ‘off limits’ to all the kids.
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Aha. Wait til Christmas.
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See my question to The Mouthy Housewives. I hate Halloween. Forget the decor – the cost of a bag of candy is equivalent to the amount I am going to have to spend at the orthodonist in the near future. Is it PC to boycott Halloween? Or will my kids get made fun of by their peers forever? Will give my kids something to write about someday at the very least.
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Your ghosts look great! No need to compete with the house with all the blow ups. Did you make it back there? Did the birds on the top of the page just change or I am very slow at noticing?
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I am SUCH an seasoned suburbanite that I’ve had a skeleton coming out of the ground for THREE years now.
This year I stepped the decorating up a notch and have about a dozen pots of mums artfully arranged around my front door. And all of this was accomplished just a week after my lobotomy!
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I’m still waiting for the day to come where I can decorate and it looks amazing:) Happy Halloween!
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