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My mom was visiting this weekend. And that sweet woman got up every morning with my children so Rick and I could sleep in a bit. Now my mom has the most loving heart but sometimes loses a teensy bit of focus on what she’s doing which is why she is banned from making coffee in my home.

Before you peg me the cruelest daughter in South Florida, please note that she once spilled coffee on a very white rug. Plus on two other occasions, she spilled wet grinds through multiple drawers onto papers that could have been birth certificates and insurance documents but were probably just delivery menus.  All of this resulted in some fierce clean up and an understanding that I would make the coffee.

And as a result, there was no major coffee spillage over her visit.

However, there were some poop droppings.

My mom distinctly remembers changing 1-year-old Cash’s diaper but somewhere between wrapping up the diaper and getting it into the garbage, a few poops fell out out. Nothing completely gross (of course my assessment of “not completely gross” is based on 9 years of parenting so you might actually think it’s completely disgusting). But really – just a little poop on the floor here and another there.

She claims they just popped out of the diaper and she missed it but I’m wondering if she was trying to send me a message… “If you don’t wake up and make me coffee when I am caring for your 5 children, then you will find worse things on your floor than some innocent little coffee grinds.”

Whichever the case, I think we can once again confirm that my mother is not a detail person. But she does have 4 graduate degrees, including a PhD, so no one can be good at everything.

My mom was in town for a baby naming ceremony for 1-year-old Cash and a family birthday party for my 4-year-old twins. We sang happy birthday 3 times. With 3 cakes. And Cash really seemed to like this thing we call sugar.

Cash and the cake

The weekend was a mix of joy and sadness because at the very same time Rick’s 92-year-old grandmother called Mom Mom Sybbie was in hospice care. And she died later that night.

Now I know that 92 years is a lot of years to be on the planet and Rick’s family is grateful for every one of them. But this was a very funny sassy lady and it’s hard to let go of that kind of sparkle.

Mom mom, summer and ilene

Rick’s family got together for a casual memorial service and shared a lot of stories. Like how Mom Mom Sybbie would take all her grandchildren to 7-11 and everyone got to pick out two pieces of candy and all the kids figured out pretty quickly that you had to get candy that she didn’t like or else she’d eat it.

She was an avid card player who believed in few parenting rules and eating dessert first.

I remember one of my last visits with her, she said to Rick and me, “Come visit again when you have less time!”

When we came home from the memorial, my big girls stayed up making pie with my Aunt Terrell (AKA Auntie T) who is my son Cash’s Godmother and was visiting from out of town.

Now normally on a school night, I would hurry my girls off to bed but it suddenly seemed like making pie with your Aunt Terrell is a hell of a lot more important than an extra hour of sleep. I knew my girls would never remember being tired the next day but they might just remember the night Auntie T taught them how to make an apple pie.

So Dylan and Summer stayed up way too late but not late enough to actually eat any of it.

My mom and Auntie T flew out very early the next morning to head back North but Auntie T left a note…

“There is no shame in eating pie for breakfast! It’s like eating dessert first!!”

And she was right. So we all ate pie for breakfast. Mom Mom Sybbie would have been proud.


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18 Responses to for the mothers, the aunts and the grandmothers

  • Jennifer says:

    Lovely post. Sorry for your loss. But the take away is wonderful. Mom Mom Sybbie would have been proud! AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY to all!

  • Aunt Michele says:

    What a beautiful tribute to my mom. You found the perfect way to honor her memory. She loved you and your brilliant blog. Not too long ago she would have given you a run for your money in the witty department.
    Thanks also for raising five of her many great-grandchildren in such an incredible way. I know she is smiling down on you, and probably saying you could have given me an entire blog!

  • shelly says:

    I had a very dear friend who unfortunately died in her 30’s but she always said “Eat dessert first!” too and at her wake they were pieces of cake as you walked in the door. What a beautiful way to live your life. Thanks for sharing your tribute to Mom Mom Sybbie.

  • Bubbie says:

    Kelcey thank you so much for your funny loving blog and tribute to our beloved mom mom. She loved each and every one in her family the Best and will live on in all of our hearts forever and in the beautiful stories we will share with our children. I know she and pop pop are dancing and singing and talking about all of us and smiling ❌⭕️

  • Lanie says:

    Love the staying up late and the pie for breakfast. I am so sorry to read about Mom Mom Sybbie. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Sending you hope and hugs. xoxo

  • I’m so sorry for you loss. So many lessons to learn on spending time with family, life is indeed short(even after 92 years), and dessert truly is the best meal of the day. I love this post so much. Smiles. xoxo

  • Franny says:

    Bravo Kelcey for expressing so well, that which we feel about our memories of Sylvia. She sure did make us laugh!!

  • Aunt Terrell says:

    What a beautiful tribute to MomMom Sybie! Thank you for sharing your wonderful family with me. And I’m glad you all enjoyed pie for breakfast!
    XO Auntie T

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kelcey kintner