It’s the night before Columbus Day…
Which means my kids want to know why we celebrate Christopher Columbus when it was the Native Americans (now called American Indians – Try to keep up!) who discovered this land.
I don’t know but there’s no school tomorrow! And I bet we can find a parade!!
And now they want to know if the Native Americans were Jewish. Of course, they do. Because it’s 8 pm and they are in bed and they can’t possibly sleep without knowing whether a Native American ever did the hora.
Hmm… I don’t think so. Good night!
Oh! So the American Indians must be Christian, they conclude.
Hmm…. That doesn’t sound right.
Okay, kids I’ve looked it up. Turns out American Indians have lots of different religions including Ghost Dance and Drum Religion and even Christianity. I guess the Christian influence is thanks to all the white boys who showed up on their shores and I can only assume taught them the awesomeness of Christmas and Elf on a Shelf.
But it doesn’t appear that any of the American Indians have ever had a mother-in-law that made kugel. Which is a shame. But we could totally send them some at Passover.
In conclusion kiddos, I’m not sure why we celebrate Christopher Columbus because he didn’t really discover American at all but he sure did do a lot of sailing and his boats had fun names and well, you can’t overlook that kind of thing.
So good night.