Vacation week is OVER and well, it was actually pretty great.
I realized I’m turning a corner with my twins turning 3 soon and I can finally take all 4 of my kids to public places by myself without having an anxiety attack. It’s going to be a whole new world for us — oh wait, forgot about the baby coming. Never mind.
We really did have a good week.
I mean, other than Harlowe accidentally getting her head stuck in an Easter bucket for a few tense minutes.
It happened at an Easter egg hunt. It was held at this gorgeous retirement community and we brought my dad. He was a little concerned that “Easter egg hunt” was an euphemism for “You are about to be admitted against your will to this assisted living facility” but I reassured him that we could never afford the place. He can live out his golden years in our basement because we take care of family.
I also got pink eye which sort of sucked. And no, you can’t get it from this post. I’m pretty sure I got it from bad karma as I explain on Alpha Mom.
Pink eye meant no eye make up and no contact lenses all week. Obviously, I already feel enormously alluring at 32 weeks pregnant, so this only heightened my incredible sex appeal.
And it was at one of these moments – when I was wearing no makeup and glasses – that I ran into a local mom who rarely notices my existence in the world.
Do you know one of these moms?! They know you but they pretend not to know know you. Why do they do that?!
Normally, she wouldn’t say hello but as I’ve mentioned my magnetic sex appeal is fully on display so I guess that’s why she stopped.
We started talking about my pregnancy and exercise and for some reason (because this not-so-friendly mom makes me nervous), I start saying… “Well, I try to walk but it’s hard because I feel like the whole time I’m walking, all I feel is VAG*NA, VAG*NA, VAG*NA….”
I was trying to explain that once you are in your third trimester, there is just so much pressure on your vag*na. But somehow I couldn’t stop saying the word. And she didn’t laugh at all which made me more nervous so I just kept repeating the word.
“Oh my gosh, why do I keep saying vag*na?!!” I thought to myself.
Finally, by the grace of god, I stopped and she said goodbye and well, that might be the end of our pretend friendship.
But other than the Harlowe stuck in an Easter bucket, the pink eye and the vag*na episode, the vacation was all good.
P.S. The natural easter egg dyes I ordered rocked. Great colors and no stained hands!