Everyone is just so shocked that Bristol Palin edged out Brandy and is still on “Dancing with the Stars” despite low scores. I’ve watched the show for about 8 minutes so I feel fully qualified to speak on the issue.
One of three things is happening here…
1. It’s a massive tea party effort to achieve their three key goals of cutting back the role of government, lowering taxes and crowning Bristol the winner of “Dancing with the Stars.”
2. She’s a really good dancer but the liberal media is making her look like a bad dancer with their lefty leaning lights and socialist smoke and mirrors.
3. The voting public, who also enjoys “Jersey Shore” and “Two and a Half Men” knows that Bristol Palin is a hell of a lot more entertaining to watch than some R & B singer. What’s her name? Oh yeah. Brandy. I mean, would some guy have shot up his television screen if Brandy went to the finals? Very doubtful.
Meanwhile, in other news, I am so sick of hearing about Kate “I’m Going To Be a Princess” Middleton. We don’t need British royalty. We have our own.
1. Sarah Palin: Pretty. Charming. And maybe not so smart. But whoever said royalty was smart? Remember that Prince Charles always preferred Camilla Parker Bowles to the lovely Diana. How brilliant could he possibly be?
2. Mr. and Mrs. Tom Cruise: “Risky Business” and “Dawson’s Creek” all in one family? Obviously they are a notch above us all.
3. Eva Langoria and Tony Parker: An actress. A sports star. Both very good looking. Together these two could reign over America for decades to come. Wait – what? They broke up over inappropriate texting and a possible affair? Oh drat. They’re off the list.
4. Oprah: At the very least, she’s the queen of talk shows. And her prince Gayle seems quite regal indeed.
5. Lady GaGa: Nobody wears a meat dress unless they’ve got some royal blood.
Yeah, take that Britain.
And don’t think I’ll be getting up at 4 am to watch your stupid, 30 foot long lace train, fancy shmancy, regal affair. I’d rather sleep than watch that dumb wedding live.
I’ll just watch it on DVR later in the day.