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I’m really getting no RESPECT around here. And unlike that greedy Aretha, I don’t even need the whole word. I’d settle for a little R.E.S.P. Or these days, maybe just the “R.” 1 year-old Summer is a full-on, don’t-even-look-at-me-if-your-name-is-not Rick Folbaum, daddy’s girl.

At least, I can usually count on my girl, 3 year-old Dylan, to give me the sugar. But today she passed on our special alone time to hang with Kira, the babysitter. Kira is a ball of creative, energetic fun, but hey, look at me, I’m your super fab mama. Dylan, are you listening? Kira, can you get Dylan’s attention for me?

And I do A LOT of gritty work around here. Summer made another gigantic, turbo poop. Her number 2 is more like 4 or 5 these days. It was just before bedtime, so once I got Summer scrubbed down, I popped the two girls in the tub. Moments later, little drips of poop started surfacing. (Note to reader: I know this is totally nauseating. Stay with me. We’ll get through this together. Don’t abandon me now.)

“Dylan, GET OUT OF THE TUB.” It was “Caddyshack” (unfortunately without the Baby Ruth) as I desperately tried to evacuate the waters. I wrapped Summer in a towel as I waited for that nasty bath water to drain. And of course, her gratitude was plentiful. Summer proceeded to poop again – this time in the fresh, white towel. At that moment, I was grateful for a huge stash of wipes, a washer/dryer and wine (all in the apartment).

portable-potty.jpgBut as you all know, Dylan takes care of her potty needs. Quite of few of you were interested in that portable potty. Here it is. Of course, this pic is not Dylan. Just some poor sap who will probably still be known in high school as the “potty boy.” Well, he sure does look happy now, going potty in the street and all. I hope he got paid a lot of cash. You know his parents spent it all on fancy meals and not a cent went to his college fund. I mean, that’s what I would do.

Let’s move on because there has been quite a bit about bodily fluids this week. Really more than I can handle. And people, we’ve got a presidential race going on. I don’t really discuss politics at home but I did put on coverage of the New Hampshire primary on Tuesday night to see what was going on. Dylan was SHOCKED that I turned on the TV for something other than Elmo or Mr. Rogers and was very inquisitive about the whole thing.

Dylan: What’s this?

Me: It’s the New Hampshire primary. These are the candidates who are running for President.

Dylan: Pes-ee-what?

Me: President. The President is the person who leads the country. Our country is the United States.

Dylan: Oh.

Me: Our current President is George Bush.

Dylan: George Bush?

Me: Yes, George Bush is the President.

Dylan: George Bush? Yuck.

I don’t know where she came up with the idea that George Bush is the equivalent to broccoli or spinach but apparently that’s how she feels. I’ll let you know if she shares anything about the current field of presidential hopefuls. Right now, she’s off to do some polling and perhaps nominate Kira, the babysitter.

mama bird notes

Our beauty girl Alex is here with an amazing product for those dry winter hands. Just click on drooling over this to read more.

Finally, need a little feedback from other super smart mamas on this crazy job called child rearing? Or advice on anything else that’s stressing you out? Just email me your question or problem and I’ll post it under askamama. Questions can be anonymous.

8 Responses to all i’m askin’ in return, honey

  • Rick says:

    In case anyone was wondering, we’re fair and balanced in this household. This morning, Dylan was looking at the front page of the paper with big pictures of both Hillary Clinton and John McCain. She asked who each of them were and when I told her the name of the first woman with a legitimate shot of winning her party’s nomination for president, she replied “Hillary Clinton, YUK!” So, apparently, Dylan’s an independent.

  • Betsy says:

    Hey, i love our portable potty- the Potette. We have used it several times in “garage” (tailgate)of the car. e got ours in England, and the same little boy was on the picture. I’m glead tok know that we can get new liners here.

  • Shannon says:

    Oh this post was super funny…thanks for sharing… That POOR potty boy! How will he ever get though all the teasing he is to endure? Although, my posted pic of Josh’s poop isn’t much better…At least it wasn’t Nationally publicized like this poor lad’s…

  • Michelle says:

    The whole Potty thing has me a bit perplexed. As a South Floridian with no NYC street cred, I can say this… it’s no different than some of the potty issues Wendi and I have to know about in our Senior Citizen Communities. (Now I may have taken this conversation too far!!)

  • Janna says:

    Rick — thanks for the fair, balanced news. πŸ™‚ I’d expect nothing less from a Fox-man. And yes, Dylan sounds like she’s usually independent. πŸ™‚

  • Very funny, but you should check out this blog, diaper free adventures. It's chronicles a mom who is practicing elimination communication (you know, not using a diaper at all.) It's both funny and shocking and interesting all at the same time. But this post in particular will have you rolling. And I can't imagine how this little oy is going to feel when he grows up!

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