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Apr
09
2008

Are you doing this twittering thing? It’s a way to let friends know what you’re up to with one line, real-time updates. I want to twitter. I truly do but every time I attempt to fill in that box, “What are you doing?” I kind of freeze. Must think of something clever. Must come up with a tidbit that is smart and brilliant and fabulous.

I log off.

I’m such a sissy. Log back on.

I type in, “drinking cafe mocha.” Well, drat, that is so dreadfully boring that I almost snoozed off just typing it… even with the caffeine buzz.

Delete.

I type, “Thinking about why Americans are paying for for Iraq’s reconstruction when Iraq is making billions in oil revenue.” Dang. I’m way over thinking this Twitter thing.

Delete.

Be loose, be casual, whatever pops into my mind.

I type, “Do you think people pee in gym showers?” That’s such a gross thought. Not good. People will think I pee in gym showers.

Delete.

Log off.

Make mental promise to twitter later.

Oh, can you help me with something else? Here’s a recent conversation with 3 1/2 year-old Dylan.

Dylan: I have boogers coming out of my nose.

Me: Honey, get a tissue. And please don’t call them boogers.

Dylan: What should I call them?

Me: (silence) Um….

Dylan: Snot?

Me: No, snot is not good. Um… I don’t know. Just say, “I need a tissue.”

So is there a nice, lady-like word for snot/boogers?

And while you contemplate the twitter and booger situation, I’ve got a tip for you:

When you go to the gym and get on the cardio machine and notice that all the tv stations are set to tortuously tedious, time-slowing channels like ESPN and CNBC, don’t attempt to fix the situation. Don’t grab a remote and try to change just one of the televisions to MTV because you will mistakenly change the entire row of televisions to Judge Hatchett.

This will really irritate one of the guys watching ESPN and a bunch of other cardio focused, intense New Yorkers. And they will only get madder when you can’t seem to change any of the tv’s back to the original stations and you have to abandon your Arc Trainer to get help from some Equinox staffer who’s as clueless about the televisions as you are.

By the time you’ve sorted the whole thing out and made your apologies, you only have a few minutes left to exercise anyway. So twitter this it’s best to avoid the gym altogether.

mama bird notes

Contributing mama Jordana Bales is due with baby #2 this week. Boy? Girl? Anyone have a feeling? She did finally spill her baby names and I’m pleasantly surprised at the choices of Obama (for a boy) and Hillary (for a girl). So timely and political. Oh, alright, those are probably not the names.

Contributing mama Alex is back with her beauty diary this week. Click on drooling over this to find out about a fabulous, reasonably priced skincare line (I use it too).

And don’t forget to leave a comment this week to enter to win the Toby + Rei giveaway. This 100% organic cotton lunch sack in pebble grey with cool robot graphic …

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and this awesome 100% organic cotton tee, sewn in a sweatshop free environment. Pebble gray with orange + sky blue robot graphic. Size 2T

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36 Responses to a twit at twittering

  • izzy's mama says:

    "Mama boogers" is the cry I often hear which means I am dispatched to wipe them immediately, even though he is almost five. Occasionally his "nose is running" too.. perhaps that is the best phrase?

  • My husband coined the terrm "snugs/snoogs". It may get one politeness point over "booger" but that's not saying much…

    Twitter would twitter me right into craziness b/c I could never keep up…

    I'd rather watch MTV at the gym too… πŸ˜‰

  • Kimberly says:

    Hey Kelcey, this is Lori Boyer’s stepdaughter, Kimberly:) We met at Quinn’s wedding. Anyway…I’ve been kind of lurking on your blog for a while, but i had to answer this question!

    My mom always had us call it “nose dirt”. It’s still what I think when I think of it:)

    I love your blog, btw, especially since Daniel and I are expecting our 1st!

  • Jordana says:

    Hey girl – thanks for putting those feelers out. I’m dying to find out if it’s an Obama or a Hillary. To be honest, I really wanted to name it Chelsea but wanted to avoid the Kelcey/Chelsea confusion.

  • Abby Siegel says:

    Oh yes, I have never heard of twittering but yesterday at the gym, when I was on the elliptical and catching up on an ep of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, some fool tried to changew the channel and I was like "oh no you didn't" but the channel would n ot change so good for me. Quality TV always wins, I tell ya. Ha ha!!!! Actually, that show is kind of funny and cute.

  • Jennifer H says:

    I can’t imagine Twittering. That’s too much pressure, and most of the stuff I do isn’t all that interesting, not even to me. Damn, now I’m a little sad about that.

    As for the nose issue, a long time ago I worked as a nanny for some people who didn’t want me to ask their son to blow his nose. “Clear your sinuses” was the proper suggestion. And mucus was the only proper reference to what came out.

    I didn’t work for them for all that long.

  • Robyn says:

    Thanks for clearing up the twitter mystery for me! You have confirmed that I will NEVER try it — too much pressure. I can barely be witty on my blog, let alone in ONE line!

    We go with "boogies" in my house. Yuck.

  • Sandrine says:

    Tengo screams around the house, "my nose is running", as if someone was cutting off his arm (he's been traumatized by bloody nose all winter), I used to call it "crotte de nez" in French…Nose Poop and when I said that to Tengo I realized never again…

  • Daphne says:

    we are a boogie house…we get the boogie fever, the boogies in the noses, etc.

    What is twittering? Sounds kind of dirty…maybe like setting email to vibrate?

  • Kelcey- I am a twittering addict. I don't want to be a pusher or anything but I think you should try it – I would totally follow you. You'd be hilarious. No pressure. People same dumb stuff all the time – doesn't matter. It's gone in half a second- replace by someone else's thoughts — still fun though- give it a shot. I'll follow!!

  • Erin says:

    Can't think of a lady like way to say boogies. I should have asked the Queen what she calls them when I was at her house last week. πŸ™‚

    Thanks for the info on the skin care line. I have been looking for something green but not super expensive. I'm going to check it out. Thanks too for always making me laugh!

  • Jessi says:

    My two yr old calls them “booders” along with anything else that might be on his face, nose, or mouth (food, dry skin, dirt, etc) Booders is not any different than boogers, it’s just 2 yr old talk. Still the same stinking word.
    My first twitter was this morning (thank you, Kelc for reminding me). So what did I type in? “typing in this box” because that’s exactly what I was doing. πŸ™‚

  • We say boogies in our house… there just isn’t really a polite way to refer to having a nose full of unmentionables, now is there??

    I twitter, oh, once every few weeks. I can’t keep up with my daughter, much less try and keep up with Twitter!!

  • Aruna says:

    Great blog – just found you and I smiled reading it.

    I teach kid's yoga and often do a whole 10 minutes on how to clean the nose (not with your fingers because then whatever you touch, like me, gets dirty) – and especially why we don't eat what's in there (I like the suggestion of "nose dirt" – who eats dirt?).

    But I have never come up with a good name for it – I usually ask the kids what they call it. I think anotomically it is called "mucus" or nose mucus. I don't know if kids would know it by that name.

  • mayberry says:

    Every time I look at someone's Twitter page, I feel like there is a huge cocktail party that I am not invited to. Or if I were there, I'd be smiling awkwardly trying to bust into a conversation already in progress.

  • I just started twittering and i have the same issue- I never know what to type and I over think it way too much! I hope people don’t pee in the gym shower… and i would say boogie. πŸ™‚

  • mackbeth says:

    Twittering hasn't hit in Colorado yet (at least it hasn't hit my world) I am intimidated to post a comment on your funny blog. You have many Colorado mommies laughing out west. Hopefully my son can be way cool with a new lunch bag!

  • susiej says:

    Isn't blogging enough?! Seriously, do we need to keep our laptops attached to our elbow so we can type everything that pops into our mind? However, I do like looking at other's — like Guy's.

  • Lanie says:

    Not sure about twitter or a PC name for a runny nose but I do remember being in Hawaii in the gym and Rick was on the TV. I felt like I was working out with a friend :-). Jordana – good luck with Hillary or Obama!

  • Milena says:

    We call it moco in Spanish and Moquito (think mosquito sans the "s" for the pronunciation) is the cute kiddie way to say it. As in: you've got 'moquito' up your nose sweetheart? Unless they speak Spanish, people will think something less snotty-related is going on.

    Twitter this – worrying as always about what to twitter.

    Your gym tv escapade made me laugh and laugh. As always, your regular everyday things are more funny and interesting than I can ever make mine. Great post. How's Rick's hand doing by the way?

  • Tully's Mama says:

    thanks for cheering me up with some good giggles. I'm down with "walking" pneumonia. I don't feel like walking anywhere. I can twitter, though.


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