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I’ve been feeling a bit in the garbage dumps lately. My milk free boobs are shrinking faster then 1 year-old Summer can devour a roll. My husband has noticed too. This is a recent conversation.

Rick: (Staring at my chest) You’re right. Your boobs are smaller.

Me: Yeah, thanks (I respond glumly).

Rick: They’re beautiful.

Me: O.k. (Still glum).

Rick: Did I say something wrong?

Me: Very few women want to be told their boobs are getting smaller.

Rick: But you pointed it out this morning.

Me: Yes, but that doesn’t mean I’m happy about it.

Rick: Oh.

I start to wonder if my breasts could get small enough that my poochy mama belly could poke out further than my chest. Sadly, probably already the case. I decide my state is too fragile to investigate further.

I’m also in a funk over New Year’s. And then it’s a double Debbie downer that I even care a tidbit about New Year’s Eve. My husband is working so he’s doing his thing. As for me, if I stay in, capital L on the forehead. If I go out, mega moolah up the wazooh. And for what? That stupid, suspicious feeling that everyone MUST be having more fun than me. Of course, they aren’t. But they MUST be… right?! This is the time of year, when I wish I was a superstar pop diva. That way, I could ring in the new year Vegas style, charging big beans to sing all my greatest hits. You would love my stuff from the 70’s.

You know what is coming in the New Year? All those plans we put off. December is so stuffed with obligations and merriment, that many of us love to to throw these words around with everyone and the mailman:

“Yes! We’ll make plans in the New Year. Perfect! We’ll absolutely put something on the calendar in January. Happy Holidays.” With a wave and a smile, we are off.

This is what I wish I had the guts to say:

“Yes! We’ll make plans in the New Year. If not, 2008… 2009 at the latest. Worst case scenario, 2010. Happy Holidays!” With a wave and a smile, I am off.

I’m also bummed my super sassy sister Quinn went back to her home in Memphis. (Editorial note: Not to be confused with my extra sassy friend Liz who lives in New York. If I keep throwing the term “sassy” around, I will provide a sassy “who’s who” directory for your convenience). Everything is just more fun with Quinny around. She’s the kind of girl that can make you smile about small boobs and lame New Year’s Eve plans.

But no need for me to cry about any of this. As 3 year-old Dylan said to me recently, “Mommies don’t cry. They just say no.”

Well, actually Dylan, sometimes they do both.

mama bird notes

Have you met Viv and Ingrid? Oh, you must. Click on drooling over this.

The results are in. So how much tv does your kid really watch everyday? 28% of you say no evil boob tube. Another 28% commit to one hour or less. 11% draw the line at 1 to 2 hours. 28% of you allow your kids to enjoy the small screen 2 to 3 hours a day. And 5% say as much as the child wants.

Take our latest mama poll. 2008 is a bouncy, fresh start – so what is your New Year’s resolution? Come on, share mamas! Just click on your mama says what?

Finally, help another mama out. Any creative ideas on getting kids to eat at least a LITTLE more? Click on askamama.

9 Responses to a bluish new year

  • Kerry says:

    please come ring in the new year with us…we're having a family party starting at 5pm that will include cookie decorating, the curious george movie playing on the big screen, freeze dancing, lots of fattening food, 11 kids, 1 [hopefully] sleeping baby and lots of wine flowing for the adults. we'll bust out the noisemakers and auld lang zyne at 8pm and pretend that the ball has dropped. it's the "new" new year's eve. seriously, come up to the burbs and join us!!!

  • Jennifer Poma says:

    don't be blue darlin', you're too cule to be blue (!) i just saw your fam at blkr playground -and they are just soo wonderful! but i know the expectations around NYE…we have friends staying w/us from Madrid (childless of course) who are roaring to go and I have no babysitter so trying to make things interesting here, hah!) wish I could go to Kerry's party! We need to get a W.Village superstar surgeon to fix all our post-nursing boobs–i've been glum about mine for 8 mnths now! it will get better i just know it! Happy New Year!

  • Izzy says:

    That stupid, suspicious feeling that everyone MUST be having more fun than me.

    Ahhh yes, I'm familiar with that feeling. And because of it, I no longer lament staying home on NYE. It's never as fun as it's supposed to be anyway. And my post-nursing boobs? Ha! WHAT boobs?

  • Francesca says:

    i remember in high school when
    I was so pumped and excited for a NYE party – then it turned out that getting dressed for the party was 10X more exciting than the actual event. it's all over blown –
    (easier said than believed though.)

  • Kimberly says:

    my milk filled boobs are HUGE enough to make me sad.. here's a recent conversation in my house: (as i am getting ready for the gym… wearing 2 sports bras to even remotely hold these girls down)
    me: what are you staring at?
    steve: nothing
    me: yes you are. you are looking at my ridiculous boobs
    steve: they are HUGE
    me: i know.. obscene actually, hu?
    steve: they really are big!

    nice, hu? now, this conversation may make some of you jealous… but to me, it's a nightmare! if i could give you even one cup size kelc, i still wouldn't have normal size boobs! we all want what we don't have!!!! i can't wait for my deflated boobs to come back when i wean!

    as for new years, we'll be sitting home too.. sorry rick has to work.. but it is just another night really.. just one with higher hype and unrealistic expectations!

  • Lanie says:

    You can't get mastitis once you wean, right? I am just trying to look on the bright side of the boob situation. . .

    Kerry's party sounds fun! Whatever you end up doing (or not doing), Happy New Year!

  • Just canceled our big bash due to fevers and ear infections…who said new years with kids is not fun?! Excuse me, I've got 3 cases of beer and 4 bottles of champagne to drink down…

  • Kristen says:

    So sorry you are feeling blue! I appreciate your honesty. We all have blue days. I personally like Lanie's bright side and Daphne's alcohol situation. They both made me laugh. Happy New Year ladies!

  • Quinn says:

    I'm so flattered you think I could make small boobs fun. That's the best compliment I've gotten in 2008. Love you lots.

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kelcey kintner