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If you have a baby, that baby will likely fall off the bed.

I mean, it doesn’t happen to every parent. But it does happen frequently. This is based on statistical data collected from the files of I’ve-Just-Sort-Of-Heard-It-Happens-To-A-Lot-Of-Parents. It’s just that babies go from being pretty stationary to some sort of acrobatic navy seal in just a matter of minutes.

Luckily, babies are very durable and it’s usually the first time parents who suffer the most. First time parents already had their suspicions that no one should be letting them leave the hospital with an infant and now their baby rolling off the bed confirms their belief that they have no parenting skills whatsoever.

I usually leave 6-month-old Cash on the rug because this is my 5th kid and I’ve got to prove that I’ve learned something. But the other day, I had him on a twin bed and I actually said to 3-year-old Chase, “Watch Cash for a second. I’ll be right back.”

Now Chase has a lot of talents like eating chicken nuggets, throwing a ball and he’s really good at saying funny sh*t. Like recently, after we tucked him in, he came down and said, “Tomorrow when I wake up and then have a nice day. Then after that, can I have a hot dog?”

But I wouldn’t say Chase is the king of safety. In fact, he’s pretty much the opposite. And childcare might not be his calling either.

Because 3 seconds later, I came back into the room and and all I could see were baby Cash’s legs – sticking up between the wall and the bed. He had clearly taken a nose dive off the bed and got wedged between the wall and the bed.

I tried to pull Cash out but he was stuck.

(Afterward my twins reenacted me trying to pull Cash out.)

chase and harlowe bed

I panicked for a moment because I did not want to call Rick at work and say, “I know you have a 5 pm newscast but our 3-year-old was watching the baby and now the baby is trapped –  No, don’t send a camera crew.”

So I quickly took action. I lowered Cash to the ground, pulled out the bed and easily removed him. He was completely unharmed. I apologized to my sweet baby. Obviously in my 9 years of parenting, I have learned very little but there is still hope. He smiled at me so it seems like everything is cool with us.

baby cash

mama bird notes:

I am currently working with The Mother Company and Rubio Studios. The Mother Company is all about helping parents raise good people. They have some awesome DVD’s and books for children tackling topics like feelings, bullying and personal safety. I reviewed a 3-pack DVD collection that would make a wonderful Christmas gift and I am also giving one of these 3-packs away. Just click here to read my review and enter the giveaway. xo


This a time of year to feel grateful.

Like my friend who just sent me this text…

cracker text

She is feeling really grateful for crackers.

At preschool, my 3-year-old twins were asked what they are grateful for. Of course, it was a lot of mommy mommy…

thankful 1

I assume that by “toys and Tommy Tommy,” they mean “our gorgeous, selfless mother.”

Well, at least they didn’t say mac and cheese.

thankful 2

Although in defense of Lexi and Justin, mac and cheese is pretty awesome.


Last year for Summer’s birthday, we asked for no gifts. Instead, we requested money ($10 or $15) so that Summer could spend half the money on a really special toy and give the other half to charity.

It felt weird to ask for money but it was less than someone would spend on a present anyway and I felt really good about my kids raising money for those in need.

Summer ended up collecting $80 to donate and we planned on giving it to a local community center that helps out disadvantaged families. Then life intervened. Rick got a new job, we had a baby, we sold our house, we bought a new house and moved to Florida. Recently, as we were unpacking, we found the envelope with the $80.

My two older girls, Dylan and Summer, asked what we should do with it. I said – let’s just buy a new iPod! Okay, what I really said was… Let’s give it to tzedakah at Dylan’s Hebrew school.

In Dylan’s Hebrew class, they collect money each week (called tzedakah) to donate to a charity. It’s part of a religious obligation to help those in need and each week the kids are encouraged to throw in a few coins.  It doesn’t matter if you are rich or poor, you give whatever you can to help others.

So Dylan, Summer and I briefly discussed giving the money to tzedakah and then I kind of forgot about the whole conversation. I guess because I have 5 kids or something.

A few weeks later, I received a phone call from Dylan’s teacher who wanted to know if we had really meant to throw 80 dollars into the tzedakah box.

Dylan had just walked into class, put 80 bucks in the tzedakah box and sat in her seat. It wasn’t until the teacher inquired where the money came from that Dylan spoke up and said, “That’s from my sister Summer.”

That is all she said.

At which point, the teacher said, “Can I have your mother’s number please?”

I explained the back story to Dylan’s teacher. Turns out Dylan’s Hebrew class won an ice cream party for raising the most money and yes, Summer was the special guest.

Per our request, the money will be donated to children that are hungry. Did you know that nearly one in five children in America lives in households that struggle to put food on the table?

Can you imagine as a mother not being able to feed your children? Can you imagine that child trying to learn and function without sufficient, healthy food? It makes my heart hurt to think about it.

Summer’s 7th birthday is quickly approaching and although it feels funny to ask a bunch of parents that I don’t know for money instead of crappy Barbie dolls, I am going to do it.

It took nearly a year for that 80 dollars to find its way to the right place.

But it reminded me of the importance and power of giving.


Both my older girls are in the Girl Scouts – one is a Daisy and one is a Brownie. I wanted them to be a part of the Girl Scouts because of the focus on community service. Unfortunately, I’ve noticed that  “serving your community” does not mean ironing the badges on your own Girl Scout vest.

This is Summer’s first year as a Daisy and I somehow managed to actually get to the Army Navy store to buy her blue vest. The great part about going to an Army Navy store is that while you are picking up your Girl Scout necessities, you can also buy a gun mug.


I love drinking my morning brew with a pistol grip.

I bought all the required patches and then I hit a standstill on the vest. While Dylan had a lot of badges from her previous year as a Brownie, Summer had a whole lot of nothing…

summer with no Daisy patches

She would go to Girl Scout meetings like this. It seemed a little sad.

I explained that it was a very clean, contemporary look. Wasn’t she excited to not have her vest all messed up with a bunch of patches like her troop number and other crap?!

She was completely unswayed by my “modern aesthetic” argument.

Finally, on Friday night, Rick and I watched “Pitch Perfect” for the first time while I ironed and ironed.

In fact, I accidentally ironed one of Dylan’s Brownie badges onto Summer’s Daisy vest. It’s not really my fault because the movie is pretty entertaining.

So back to the Army Navy store to get a new Brownie patch for Dylan. Plus a great opportunity to pick up a pair of camouflage short shorts for myself.


I finally finished Summer’s vest and as you can see, she is 100% satisfied.

summer with daisy patches

Pure joy.

Or maybe her expression is more, “Thanks for finally doing that mom but I really don’t feel like taking a photo right now because you’ll probably just put it on your blog. I mean, I don’t run around trying to take pictures of you in your camouflage short shorts, do I?!”

By the way, I just found out about Badge Magic that allows you to just stick on these patches. Please someone tell me if this stuff works.

mama bird notes:

herstories-v4-2I was recently included in an amazing anthology called, “The HerStories Project: Women Explore the Joy, Pain, and Power of Female Friendship.”

I really was so honored to be included with these amazing female writers. If you are interested in purchasing the book, click here.






I remember my mom wearing one of my sister’s bathing suits for a long time.

“Why are you wearing that? It’s so old and stretched out. Why don’t you get a new one?” I asked her.

I don’t remember what she said. She hates shopping so I’m sure that was part of it. And she probably just had other stuff to do and didn’t care all that much.

How was that possible?! I once spent 20 minutes just trying to decided whether to wear loafers or sneakers on a Saturday afternoon. My young self knew that image was everything.

Well, I lost my sunglasses a week ago and you can’t really live in Florida without them.  But because we are new to the area, I didn’t know where to buy a new pair. And I’ve had other stuff to do and I guess I just didn’t care all that much, so I’ve been wearing these…

kelcey in daughter's sunglasses

Yes, those are my 9-year-old’s sunglasses.

Red with rhinestones.

I wear them in the car.

To play tennis.

Dropping my kids off at preschool.

You see if I had close friends here, I would have been mocked enough already to buy a new pair. Luckily, I have my 9-year-old who just told me she wants her sunglasses back.

mama bird notes:

I wrote a big toy review for Alpha Mom. We looked at all the toys on the “hot list” and determined whether they were hot at all.  Check it out here.

Want to give me an early Christmas gift? Like the mama bird diaries on Facebook!

kelcey kintner


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