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By Contributing Mama Renee Martinez

Have you ever wondered what it’s like to be an animal? Yes, an animal.

Let me explain.

One evening last summer while I was making dinner, two of my boys were playing in the backyard. Nothing unusual. They appeared to be happy. No arguing or bloodshed. I guess the only thing that made me suspect that they might be up to something was the fact that they were so good. No screaming, not one conflict for about 20 minutes.

The moment I walked outside to check on them, I knew I was in trouble. The mommy senses kicked in. I caught a strong scent of feces floating in the air. Neither of the boys were in sight. Were they playing hide and seek? Then I caught another whiff of the gross odor. I checked my shoes for remnants of doggy gifts often scattered in the yard but my shoes looked clean.

What on earth was that horrible smell?!

Then, I spotted them behind the trees. Did I see what I thought I saw? I could swear that I saw my son crouched down with his pants at his ankles. Did he just flash me a moon?

Then it dawned on me what the smell might be. Human poop!

Fuming, I realized there was a good chance my 7 and 5 year-old boys just did BM’s in my backyard. How, why and did my neighbors see this? Did I ask why?

I tried to control myself from screaming and calmly approached the boys. My son quickly pulled up his pants as though nothing was going on and it was just another fun time in the yard. I asked, “Hey guys, what’s going on?”

“Nothing. Just playing,” the older one explained.

For awhile they admitted nothing but finally, the 5 year old confessed, “Mommy, we were playing animals! We wanted to poop like animals too!”

It was one of those moments when as a parent you are both humored and appalled and angry at the same time. What could I say to that without cracking up? Or on the other extreme, blowing up?

I demonstrated more anger than anything. Looking back, I probably overreacted. I now understand that they were just curious, but I couldn’t fathom why they would do such a thing. The answer is that they’re kids.

As the mother of four boys (ages 8, 5, 3 and 9 months), Renee Martinez created Mothers Raising Boys to provide information on how to raise sons into fantastic men…responsible, respectful and confident members of society. Renee is creating and building a community where mothers can do their socializing as well as find opinions and answers on questions they might have on raising boys.

5 Responses to wild animals in suburbia

  • Inna says:

    ewwww!!! These boys would probably LOVE camping in the complete middle of no where, where you really have to act like an animal! And for them, believe me, its much easier to pee outside too.

  • Daphne says:

    I was waiting for the part when they played monkeys–and started flinging the feces. I guess be grateful they just left it in the yard?!

  • Bitsy says:

    My little animal once did the same thing, only in the front yard. At the time I was sure that he was the only one to ever do this and that it was probably the reason that the neighbors across the street did not speak to me. I’ve had time to get over it now and have discovered that most boys do this at some point. Still grosses me out, though.

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