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Please help. My 3 1/2 year-old toddler will never say hello or thank you to strangers/ acquaintances. Sometimes it’s really embarrassing. I feel like other people are judging me, like why can’t this mother teach her son some manners? Of course, I try to make up for it – profusely thanking the person for a gift, compliment, etc. It’s so frustrating. Will my child outgrow this? How can I teach him to be more polite? Thank you!

4 Responses to My child is rude

  • Kristen says:

    I do not profess to be an expert in this area by any means. I think one thing that has helped with us is a little bit of sign language. I have taught my girls the signs for please and thank you. If they do not say please or thank you, then I look at them, do the sign and my oldest who is three and a few months, will generally say please or thank you. I think you are doing the right thing by saying hello, saying please and saying thank you as much as possible. He will catch on. Try not to think so much about people judging you. You are doing the best you can to teach your child. He is only 3 1/2 years old. He is very young.

  • Shannon says:

    This is so tough and we struggle with politeness too…I love the signing idea by Kristen! I remind Josh to say Thank You and this usually works…We try to talk about polite behavior in the car before we get somewhere. I say, "being polite at your friend's house means XYZ" and sometimes he follows through with the good behavior. Sometimes. It's a process so don't get too frustrated.

  • Jessi says:

    I have a very polite 2 year old, but the older kids weren't as polite. It was a struggle at times….my DD was too shy to talk to anyone else at that age, while my DS would bounce off the walls talking to everyone. It took awhile, but gentle reminders to say please and thank you worked. Other times it didn't….but at least the other people knew I was trying. I'm sure they *have* to remember what it was like at that time in life, right? (I hope sometimes anyway.) I do agree with another response that signing is a great way to use manners even for the most shy child. Best wishes!

  • Betsy says:

    Try adding please and thank you into play. When you are all on the floor plalying with Little People, puppets, etc. work in opportunities for the characters to say please and thank you to each other. This way it seems more like fun and less like a lesson. When my daughter is feeling shy, it sometimes helps to say thank you together.

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kelcey kintner